Hero Dad or Bully?

[Cook]

Hard call really. The girls mother probably should have intervened. It's not even his biological child. I do agree the boy needed a lesson and am happy he got manhandled a bit, yet if some adult ever touched my kids that would be the end of him.

 

[Papa Emeritus]

Is someone who bullies only bullies, a bully in your eyes?

Of course they are. Is a thief who only steals from thieves, a thief?



Look I don't have kids (yet) and I am not pretending to know the perfect answer here but it is my honest belief that going straight to assault is not the answer no matter what anyone says. Especially so when the assault is on a kid and the assaulter is a fully grown adult.

I was bullied a lot as a kid and honestly I wish my parents/school had better prepared me for that happening. This could be achieved through bullying awareness classes and also self defence classes. Both could teach a child how to mitigate what is happening and stop it getting as far as this situation has. Bullys prey on those they see as weaker than they are, but there are ways to show you aren't weak and stop the behaviour. It is just a shame that kids aren't given the tools to do this more often.

Also you don't even know if belting this kid will even achieve anything. How do you know he won't skulk away after that beat down, and then escalate things on your child as soon as you aren't around? How would you feel then if the next time your kid ends up in hospital or worse? Also you potentially end up with a criminal record which could impact yours and your families lives forever. But feel free to continue thinking it is the best course of action.

 

[Flanagun]

ask her daughter if her dad is a hero.

anyone who takes care of the vermin who is mentally torturing a little girl which has led to suicide in many similar cases, is a fucken hero in my eye.

Why would I ask someone who is clearly partisan if I wanted a balanced perspective. Wouldn’t ask her even if I knew her. I’m in a better and more emotionally detached position to make the call. Besides anything else, most kids think their parents are heroes at that age.

 

[Wolfmother]

Oh wow I can't believe you guys think he's hero dad.. He shouldn't lay a finger on that kid , he's just the voice of society.
The girls parents should encourage the daughter to eliminate the body hair.

 

[Wahesh]

But you still don’t know not to assault minors?

There's a difference between assaulting and defending someone, I hope you know that. It's a fine line, but there is a difference. In court you would get a lighter outcome than just randomly walking up to a kid and choking him. This bloke got off with a slap on the wrist.

 

[The DoggFather]

Of course they are. Is a thief who only steals from thieves, a thief?



Look I don't have kids (yet) and I am not pretending to know the perfect answer here but it is my honest belief that going straight to assault is not the answer no matter what anyone says. Especially so when the assault is on a kid and the assaulter is a fully grown adult.

I was bullied a lot as a kid and honestly I wish my parents/school had better prepared me for that happening. This could be achieved through bullying awareness classes and also self defence classes. Both could teach a child how to mitigate what is happening and stop it getting as far as this situation has. Bullys prey on those they see as weaker than they are, but there are ways to show you aren't weak and stop the behaviour. It is just a shame that kids aren't given the tools to do this more often.

Also you don't even know if belting this kid will even achieve anything. How do you know he won't skulk away after that beat down, and then escalate things on your child as soon as you aren't around? How would you feel then if the next time your kid ends up in hospital or worse? Also you potentially end up with a criminal record which could impact yours and your families lives forever. But feel free to continue thinking it is the best course of action.

I'm a firm believer of what goes around, comes around and I also can't stand bullies.

I loved giving them a taste of their own medicine.

Good example was 3 weeks ago, some little shit kept annoying my son because he couldn't stop my son scoring in the corner. My son started to get upset, I moved my boy to the other side of the field to keep distance. The little shit followed and kept teasing him. I told my son not to tease back or hit him and just smash him in defence as payback.

I actually went to the sideline, ask who's the parent of the kid, and warned him I can't control what my son does to him. 3 or 4 tackles later, my son cracked him in a legal tackle, looked at him on the ground and just stepped over him and joined the line of defence. After the game the dad "tried" to bully me and I just replied "I can drop you quicker than my son dropped your son". Then his own team supporters told him to basically shut the fuck up.

That is the best way to deal with bullies.

As you know I'm not a lefty, not a pc or soft ****. If anyone tries to bully me or my family, I will fight back without giving a fuck.

Don't start nothing and it won't be nothing.

PS as you say you were bullied and I was the bully of the bullies. If I were the one to bully your bullies, you wouldnt be talking like this now. You would be thanking me for taking my course of action...

 

[Memberberries]

Aren't there any anti heros left?
When I was at school and I seen a kid being singled out by a group I'd step in and bully the bullies.
Even if there was a group of them I would stand my ground, I can always sense the coward in bullies!

 

[Flanagun]

There's a difference between assaulting and defending someone, I hope you know that. It's a fine line, but there is a difference. In court you would get a lighter outcome than just randomly walking up to a kid and choking him. This bloke got off with a slap on the wrist.

For a violent act against someone to be considered self defence, it has to be in defence of someone who is in immediate physical danger. That was not the case here.

I understand the Dad was pushed to his brink and kinda lost it, but he’s in no way, shape or form a hero. And putting his hands on the kid in that situation was assault. Which is why he was charged with and found guilty of assault (despite not being jailed for it)

Read the article again. It clearly states the court interpreted this as an act of assault. Not every person who is convicted of assault serves jail time and immsure the father’s concerns for his daughter and the bullying that was going on was taken into account. That doesn’t mean he didn’t commit assault.

 

[CroydonDog]

I'm a firm believer of what goes around, comes around and I also can't stand bullies.

I loved giving them a taste of their own medicine.

Good example was 3 weeks ago, some little shit kept annoying my son because he couldn't stop my son scoring in the corner. My son started to get upset, I moved my boy to the other side of the field to keep distance. The little shit followed and kept teasing him. I told my son not to tease back or hit him and just smash him in defence as payback.

I actually went to the sideline, ask who's the parent of the kid, and warned him I can't control what my son does to him. 3 or 4 tackles later, my son cracked him in a legal tackle, looked at him on the ground and just stepped over him and joined the line of defence. After the game the dad "tried" to bully me and I just replied "I can drop you quicker than my son dropped your son". Then his own team supporters told him to basically shut the fuck up.

That is the best way to deal with bullies.

As you know I'm not a lefty, not a pc or soft ****. If anyone tries to bully me or my family, I will fight back without giving a fuck.

Don't start nothing and it won't be nothing.

Yes you dealt with it in your own way, but you fortunately didn't actually punch the kid like the father in the original story does (and I hoped you wouldn't have resorted to that in any circumstance!).

As an aside, if the father decided to punch on with you, would you think that two dad' punching on on the sideline wouls have been a good look (probably would have got you oicked out of the league)...

 

[The DoggFather]

Yes you dealt with it in your own way, but you fortunately didn't actually punch the kid like the father in the original story does (and I hoped you wouldn't have resorted to that in any circumstance!).

As an aside, if the father decided to punch on with you, would you think that two dad' punching on on the sideline wouls have been a good look (probably would have got you oicked out of the league)...

Exactly. I wouldn't of hit the child for obvious reasons.

And with his dad, I knew I had more to lose than him being the coach, so I basically shut him down and basically showed I couldn't be bullied.

Now that I think about it. It would of been more effective if the father (original story) just put the fear of God in that teenager calmly. Let's the teenage coward think twice or three times before messing with his child.

I'm favourite line to get some "hectic" to calm down without threatening is "I just like to remind you that accidents do happen" lol

 

[CroydonDog]

Exactly. I wouldn't of hit the child for obvious reasons.

And with his dad, I knew I had more to lose than him being the coach, so I basically shut him down and basically showed I couldn't be bullied.

Now that I think about it. It would of been more effective if the father (original story) just put the fear of God in that teenager calmly. Let's the teenage coward think twice or three times before messing with his child.

I'm favourite line to get some "hectic" to calm down without threatening is "I just like to remind you that accidents do happen" lol

Well, the father said his intention was just to talk to the kid, and he snapped when the kid was being smug. I do appreciate a father wanting to confront his kid's bully (especially if it had got the the stage that was alleged), and I stand up for that, but the physical bit, no. I can see how it happened, but I don't think it can't be condoned, if that makes sense.

I'm glad you got the result, but people can be unpredictable.

 

[The DoggFather]

Aren't there any anti heros left?
When I was at school and I seen a kid being singled out by a group I'd step in and bully the bullies.
Even if there was a group of them I would stand my ground, I can always sense the coward in bullies!

Standing up for yourself isn't encouraged in this day and age, doesn't suit the sheep agenda

 

[The DoggFather]

Well, the father said his intention was just to talk to the kid, and he snapped when the kid was being smug. I do appreciate a father wanting to confront his kid's bully (especially if it had got the the stage that was alleged), and I stand up for that, but the physical bit, no. I can see how it happened, but I don't think it can't be condoned, if that makes sense.

I'm glad you got the result, but people can be unpredictable.

Well being a Real Estate Agent and Bouncer, you learn a thing or two about people lol

 

[Hacky McAxe]

Violently attacking the kid is going overboard. Something definitely needed to be done but there's better ways of doing it. Either deal with it through the normal channels or just scare the shit out of the kid.

 

[GA45]

He’s a hero he just done it the wrong way. All parents should be standing up for their kids but should also discipline them when they step out of line. The problem these days is less parents parent and we get these shits doing what they want because in their eyes no one can touch them.

 

[blueyedsamurai]

He should of went to the boys parents, give the dad a slap if he didn't take it seriously.

 

[Bad Billy]

I’d like to think I’d be a little more mature than him, but if I’m honest, and my kid was being bullied like that, I’d probably do worse.
Not a hero.
Not a bully.
Just a good dad.

 

[Vlasnik]

All I'm going to say is that discipline starts at home and IMO there is nothing wrong with a good old fashioned spanking. Mr Bladen is an old fashioned dad in my eyes standing up for his step daughter. In this case in a world of digital media I fail to see why the parents of the alleged bully could not be fined if evidence of bullying is available.

 

[Mr Invisible]

In the day and age we live in, the kids VERY lucky a good old fashioned choke hold is all he got. Take a leaf from some of the shit going on in Britain with the acid attacks, and this situation could have been so much worse, and they kid wouldn't have had a clue who did it.

I.E Some random guy walks up, throws a beaker/bottle of sulfuric acid in the kids face, and runs off.

Kid faces school all deformed without a clue who did it, and father gets away because nobody knows who he is.

 

[Flanagun]

I'm a firm believer of what goes around, comes around and I also can't stand bullies.

I loved giving them a taste of their own medicine.

Good example was 3 weeks ago, some little shit kept annoying my son because he couldn't stop my son scoring in the corner. My son started to get upset, I moved my boy to the other side of the field to keep distance. The little shit followed and kept teasing him. I told my son not to tease back or hit him and just smash him in defence as payback.

I actually went to the sideline, ask who's the parent of the kid, and warned him I can't control what my son does to him. 3 or 4 tackles later, my son cracked him in a legal tackle, looked at him on the ground and just stepped over him and joined the line of defence. After the game the dad "tried" to bully me and I just replied "I can drop you quicker than my son dropped your son". Then his own team supporters told him to basically shut the fuck up.

That is the best way to deal with bullies.

As you know I'm not a lefty, not a pc or soft ****. If anyone tries to bully me or my family, I will fight back without giving a fuck.

Don't start nothing and it won't be nothing.

PS as you say you were bullied and I was the bully of the bullies. If I were the one to bully your bullies, you wouldnt be talking like this now. You would be thanking me for taking my course of action...

It’s all good and well to stand up to bullies, I just think resorting up physical stuff is not the best example to set and can’t realky be condoned. The father has admitted that and probably wishes he could have the moment over again.

But having said that, it sounds like you handled the situation pretty well and your son clearly knows how to handle himself.

I can see why that frustration would bubble over when the victim was less equipped to handle themselves, I just don’t think resorting to physicality was right and I think the father in question probably regrets his action no matter how many flaps on the back he’s getting at the pub.

I understand the kid was a little shot and gave him attitude. I see how it happened. Just don’t thinknit was a heroic act. And while I understand the circumstances that led to the reaction, I don’t think it should be condoned.