The "R U OK ?" Thread

[south of heaven]

We used to have the counting of fukking potatoe gems , peas ect .and fukk me if one had 1 more pea than the other aghhhhhhhh.
Now days thats gone thank fukk .
Correction we having issues over whos eating pop corn to fast .
Ill be back

 

[Ecca]

feel for yor bro and your wife.

i cant even imagine what it is like raising kids with such conditions.

I can only hope good karma comes to you guys and you win a lotto or something.

all the best.

I know it is only a little thing, but my son is perfect, he just happens to have Autism, and yes, this makes him challenging, and infuriating, but none the less perfect. No need to feel sorry for us. Although some $'s would be nice, things are a bit tight at the moment

 

[Ecca]

We used to have the counting of fukking potatoe gems , peas ect .and fukk me if one had 1 more pea than the other aghhhhhhhh.
Now days thats gone thank fukk .
Correction we having issues over whos eating pop corn to fast .
Ill be back

Popcorn, Farrrk me... I know the feeling....

My 18 month of is a stirrer too... he knows just the right buttons to push to get the 5 year old to snap big time.... then he sits back and smiles.... little psycopath

 

[Indiandog]

I know it is only a little thing, but my son is perfect, he just happens to have Autism, and yes, this makes him challenging, and infuriating, but none the less perfect. No need to feel sorry for us. Although some $'s would be nice, things are a bit tight at the moment

mate, i have 2 kids with no autism but they are often quiet a challenge.

atleast your son doesnt make fun of your accent. lol

 

[Ecca]

mate, i have 2 kids with no autism but they are often quiet a challenge.

atleast your son doesnt make fun of your accent. lol

True that :biggrin:

 

[south of heaven]

Popcorn, Farrrk me... I know the feeling....

My 18 month of is a stirrer too... he knows just the right buttons to push to get the 5 year old to snap big time.... then he sits back and smiles.... little psycopath

Cant have 1 fukking bowl fukk me me they were like savage dogs lol I also discovered whats more fun than having 3 autistic kids ? When one is turning into a teenager lol
He is being an absolute handful lately , and its just going to get a whole lot worse when he realizes what pussy is

 

[Mr Invisible]

SOH and Ecca, aren't you both on C/Coast? Is Mrs/Miss/Ms SOH and Mrs/Miss/Ms Ecca able to shack up for female shenannigans every so often, or maybe get Ecca's partner in with SOH's partners circle of friends?

I'm a little like that myself. A bit of a social recluse / quite guarded in character. Get chatting with me and I'm perfectly friendly in real life, but meeting new people can be somewhat reserved until I suss out that other person (if that makes sense).

Leaving school in Yr 10 didn't help as teenagers can be brutal. For me leaving to persue a career ended up in the last 3 months and then on being cut off contact with my friends who deserted me. That was almost 20 years ago. Since then I've got 2 "good friends", but they both live interstate now and we only catch up once a year or so. So effectively I have 0 friends. Well I tell a lie there as my wife IS my best friend.

I don't play any sports, and being a bit of a social recluse at times, and at my age (mid 30s), making friends is a tricky one.

That said between my wife, our dog, and a close family I still lead a relatively happy life.... heck I've got over a lot worse in the past.

...

Ecca I'm sure your partner in time will change her situation, albeit theres some hanging in there until they get to school age, and then things should work out for the better.

 

[south of heaven]

^^^ wheels are in motion lol

 

[Mr 95%]

SOH and Ecca, aren't you both on C/Coast? Is Mrs/Miss/Ms SOH and Mrs/Miss/Ms Ecca able to shack up for female shenannigans every so often, or maybe get Ecca's partner in with SOH's partners circle of friends?

I'm a little like that myself. A bit of a social recluse / quite guarded in character. Get chatting with me and I'm perfectly friendly in real life, but meeting new people can be somewhat reserved until I suss out that other person (if that makes sense).

Leaving school in Yr 10 didn't help as teenagers can be brutal. For me leaving to persue a career ended up in the last 3 months and then on being cut off contact with my friends who deserted me. That was almost 20 years ago. Since then I've got 2 "good friends", but they both live interstate now and we only catch up once a year or so. So effectively I have 0 friends. Well I tell a lie there as my wife IS my best friend.

I don't play any sports, and being a bit of a social recluse at times, and at my age (mid 30s), making friends is a tricky one.

That said between my wife, our dog, and a close family I still lead a relatively happy life.... heck I've got over a lot worse in the past.

...

Ecca I'm sure your partner in time will change her situation, albeit theres some hanging in there until they get to school age, and then things should work out for the better.

You find out who your friends are when you hit on troubled times..Assasin would know better then most.. Heck my great mate..actually he's more my brother..said when I did have my accident I'd find out who my friends are.. Sure enough I did.. Not straight away..everyone's your friend when it happens..it's when the journey takes longer then expected they begin to drop off..

But Bro two good friends is better then a lot of 'false' friends..plus you have your wife..and your dog..two of the greatest of all friends.. AND the Kennel..the guys and gals in here..talk about a bunch of giving individuals..sheesh..whether it's a joke from Southy to brighten the mood..or a fund drive..or sending a signed jersey to a boofhead like me..the Kennelers are quality people..

 

[Drop Bear]

Approaching school age, the eldest almost 5 has Autism, so he is a bit of a time vampire too, no doubt once he is at school she will have some breathing space.
It just upsets me to see her struggling

They are at that age where it is difficult, especially with the autism. My second eldest was accessed at the age of 4 and we were told he had a developmental delay, that he was only at a level of an 18 month old and would always struggle with his academic future. My wife was in a similar boat to yours, didn't really know who to turn to during the day, just to get a break or have a friendly chat, someone to bounce off. We ended up enrolling him in the Narrara Special School, don't know if it's still there. Things turned around in the first year and my wife made contact with other young mums going through a similar situation. This was back before family payments and I was working two jobs just to keep food on the table. That might be something worth looking to, forget about any stigma associated with special schooling. I should add my son ended up with two degrees and a Masters of Commerce. As you may imagine, I don't have a lot of time for the so called experts and their labels for children!!

 

[south of heaven]

^^my middle boy (I gots 3 boys all autistic ) is an walking accident and asking him to normal tasks can be a fukking nightmare lol .
Yet he is already been asked to do tests for a selective school to see if he meets the criteria because he Excels and is above average in most of his subjects at school. Their "disability " can also be their greatest ability

 

[The DoggFather]

I'm not a doctor but I think autistic kids are super smart that theirs bodies take time to catch up.

I hope nobody gets offended at that. Through my mate I have seen the struggles of bring up an autistic child.

God bless you all.

 

[Wolfmother]

^^my middle boy (I gots 3 boys all autistic ) is an walking accident and asking him to normal tasks can be a fukking nightmare lol .
Yet he is already been asked to do tests for a selective school to see if he meets the criteria because he Excels and is above average in most of his subjects at school. Their "disability " can also be their greatest ability

Wow that's impressive , just a side note those selective schools are usually full of kids that have been tutored since the age of 5 so it might not be the environment you think it is.

 

[south of heaven]

Its such a broad spectrum , the oldest one has no problem adapting to sports ect , but to try to talk to him on the phone is very awkward .

 

[Wolfmother]

Its such a broad spectrum , the oldest one has no problem adapting to sports ect , but to try to talk to him on the phone is very awkward .

All kids are awkward on the phone aren't they? I bought my son his first mobile and he got a missed call from a friend and I said aren't you going to call him back after about the 3rd time I asked him to he rings and goes hi Christian and Christian goes oh hi Adrian and then it was like silence and then Christian goes what do you want and Adrian goes oh nothing and then they kind of hang up

 

[south of heaven]

Wow that's impressive , just a side note those selective schools are usually full of kids that have been tutored since the age of 5 so it might not be the environment you think it is.

Lol you try to teach him at home it wont work . We stopped homework with them due to the absolute head fukk we had to deal with.
My 6year old we thought wouldn't last a day in mainstream school could count or say a single letter before he went to school tried to teach him no luck .a year later he is reading fine spelling fine and adapting pretty well.
So we dont do homework lol but most of their grades are above average and the middle one will probably is on his way being some type of genius

 

[Ecca]

I'm not a doctor but I think autistic kids are super smart that theirs bodies take time to catch up.

I hope nobody gets offended at that. Through my mate I have seen the struggles of bring up an autistic child.

God bless you all.

As SoH said, it is a spectrum, a lot of ASD kids get hyper focused on one subject, of those, some get focused on Maths, Science, English, History etc, these are the super smart ones. Others get hyper focused other more mundane things.

Generally you see or here about these SUPER SMART ASD Kids, because they are so singularly focussed they become AMAZING at it

 

[Wolfmother]

Lol you try to teach him at home it wont work . We stopped homework with them due to the absolute head fukk we had to deal with.
My 6year old we thought wouldn't last a day in mainstream school could count or say a single letter before he went to school tried to teach him no luck .a year later he is reading fine spelling fine and adapting pretty well.
So we dont do homework lol but most of their grades are above average and the middle one will probably is on his way being some type of genius

oh h
aha sounds like fun days , imo homework is sooooo overrated in primary school , the most important thing is that they're actually happy at school and want to go.. Then you know they're teacher is somewhat engaging them.

 

[Mr 95%]

oh h
aha sounds like fun days , imo homework is sooooo overrated in primary school , the most important thing is that they're actually happy at school and want to go.. Then you know they're teacher is somewhat engaging them.

Being a former secondary teacher..This is one of the big things people forget.. Society gets obsessed with grades and academic achievements..but sometimes just getting a kid to school..on time..dressed properly..constructively participating in class..when they never used to..is a MASSIVE achievement..

Kids come from different backgrounds..some find the academic part easier then others..I must stress that doesn't mean some kids are dumb (horrible label) but just have to work a little harder then some others.. Alternatively some find other parts of school..sport, drama, art easier to adapt too..and the same as the academic side some have to work a little harder to reach the level others can..

Overall school..yes has its academic side..but it's also about developing the human being as well..and this isn't measured out of 100.. Here's a simple example.. I was given a P.E. class..even though I wasn't trained as a P.E. teacher..anyway there was a kid in it who wasn't athletically 'gifted'.. He would always 'forget' his P.E. Gear..you could tell he didn't want to participate.. It went on for a while..then one day he did bring it.. It was pretty funny because I used to look at him to see if he brought his gear..when he saw me he raised it above his head like a trophy..the class..and myself..as one..all cheered.. The smile on his face was huge..and this kid never smiled.. He ended up having a good time..

Things like this makes me miss teaching..but highlights that school is not just about grades..it's also about developing the human being..helping them realise that they are worthwhile and they have something good and valuable to contribute to this world..

 

[Hacky McAxe]

I'm not a doctor but I think autistic kids are super smart that theirs bodies take time to catch up.

I hope nobody gets offended at that. Through my mate I have seen the struggles of bring up an autistic child.

God bless you all.

There's a large spectrum of Autism from low functioning to high functioning. The high functioning (Aspergers) tend to be really good at certain things including maths and engineering. The low functioning have difficulty communicating at all.

It's a social disorder primarily but for many Autistic children a big part of the disorder is that they take in everything. It's like being constantly bombarded by everything that's going on around you. We generally phase it all out and focus on one thing where they tend to have everything coming in at the same time. It's like trying to listen to 10 different radio stations at a time.

Often Autistic children have an obsessive focus on something. They could find something like a cup to be the most interesting thing in the world.

These are just two aspects of it and there are a lot of other things involved but when you combine the two of these it can be very difficult to communicate but can lead to amazing focus and creativeness. There are many Autistic people that have gone on to become rocket scientists and inventors of amazing things. There's also the savants that become musical geniuses or famous artists.

Problem is that it's a low percentage. Most Autistic people suffer the social disorder aspect without the savant/genius aspect, but the fortunate thing is that if you diagnose it early, the correct education and focus on the child can lead to a healthy life and a good functioning adult.

I have a fair few friends with Autistic children and it can be very difficult and sometimes very decorative to the walls with a certain brown coloured paint (never understood the obsession with this but many love doing it)

The disorder is a lot more common than people expect too. It's estimated that 1 in 100 people have it but that includes the people who are so high functioning that they could go through their whole lives without realising anything is wrong.