I'm in strange space myself at the moment... I'm not stressed, I'm not anxious (immediately), I'm not depressed. I am however financially completely fucked.
When I lost my last job (made redundant after months of workplace harassment and bullying, and ended up having to take legal action against my past employer), my confidence took a massive dent, and my anxiety and depression increased.
Due to working long hours and being on call, I had zero time to study and keep my skills up to date, so they lapsed. Prior to that I was a bit of a "knowing a bit of everything" IT guy, but with no formal learning in those areas apart from TAFE. I have very specific skillsets, and in those areas (or say speciality pieces of software), I'm incredibly knowledegable. I'm largely self taught and pick things up very quickly.
So I need to get my head back in the game by studying (learning things the RIGHT way), and get myself a job, but the problem is I'm "spinning the tyres in mud".
As it stands today I have < $1500 savings (with outgoings of about $300 a month - internet, insurance, phone, etc), wifes savings < $3000, rental savings account $1600. Paying $600 a week in rent from a single income of $800 and that's before anything else (food, her car parking, health insurance, power/gas bills). We can't get any government assistance as combined we earn over $900 a fortnight.
Motivation and personal drive is pretty low though because of four things:
1. Being guarded about getting hurt again. If you don't progress past Point A, you can't get hurt.
2. There is just so much I need to learn and very little time. Think of it like trying to learn 3-5 years worth of things, in a fortnight or month.
3. I've kinda fallen out of love for the passion I once had for IT. I'm at a point where I just can't "do" technical support (customer facing). On the odd time I've had to help friends or family with technical issues of late I find I have little patience when things "dont work" like they should. Rather than enjoying IT like i used to, now it's kinda just "meh".
4. Due to the last job being large periods of doing nothing (due to lack of funds/approvals/etc), I used to fill my days surfing forums, etc etc. So that's kinda become like "work" to me, and created a vicious cycle.
I can't change careers as that costs money, and realistically I need to get myself a job paying upwards of $65k as in the past I normally paid all rent, and was struggling on $60k (inc tax).
I just need to get out of being bogged, and really push on with things. I'm sure I'll get that love for IT back, and my aim is to try and get into Tech Training/L2 Support Analyst, or something like that. Away from frontline support where you are given time to get your head down into things and get to the bottom of problems. That's where I work my best (looking for 1 percenters, or needles in a haystack). As long as my minds kept active during a working day, I work well.
So yeah... not a good spot to be in, and I feel really shit putting my wife through this and the added stress. It isn't her fault, it's 100% on me. I just don't want to lose the rental we have, and need to use that as the drive to move forwards.
...
As hard as I try to study or work I just can't seem to focus, I've tried everything from blocking out every single distraction too playing music whilst I try to get shit done, I've tried to do the most intense workouts to the point where I physically don't have the power to get up out of my chair to get distracted, I've tried group study or connecting with more people at the office but I just can't focus with everything going on.
I know given what I've said above it doesn't really qualify me for giving advise on the exact subject you and I are both struggling with.... BUT... download an app for your phone called Breath2Relax. It guides you through breathing exercises to calm you down and really get you in a zen state. You could even try yoga, tai chi, or meditation?!?
Oh and don't worry about your ex... sounds like she was a massive attention whore and you were sadly blinded to see that.
, if she doesn't like who you are than sweet you just saved yourself wasting any time. She should compliment your new life, not be your life. Mate just get out there and pretend to have some fun, who knows you might actually have some and who knows where that will lead you 
