The "R U OK ?" Thread

[Mr Beast]

Hey everyone, thought I'd share. Long story short I tired to end my life on Saturday I overdosed on Xanax took 17 to be exact. Wasn't feeling it with life and what not relationships, stress work etc. Everything compounded and I was selfish to have chosen to do what I did. With that said I was lucky someone was home to call the ambos I have no recollection or memory of what happened from the point of me swollen in them pills.

Point is I survived, got sent to hospital ICU then mental health clinic at concord hospital. After speaking with the psychiatrist they let me go.

Got home family cried and I felt guilt. Not so much hurting myself but hurting the ppl I love. Never again its not worth it. I would of case more pain towards ppl I love.

Anyways, I was going to share this as this is very personal but hey its the kennel we all share a lot of things on here.

I'm better now it's opened my eyes and my out look on life and the ppl that care.

Point is, if you're depressed speak to someone I'd recommend a psychiatrist, at first I was sceptical about them but fk me all my emotions came out and I felt better.

Not expecting the sorry to hear or glad you're okay just wanted to share and tell y'all there are ppl out there to help and support you professionally.

I think I'm a pretty healthy smart man, but fk you know what saying depression is a silent killer.

Wrote this raw unedited and on my phone

The kennel is the best and I'm happy to still be modding

 

[The DoggFather]

I know you don't want to hear it but I'm glad you're still with us brother, though our dealings over the many years I have learnt you're a top bloke.

I too tried to end it about 2 years ago, actually had a butchers knife to my throat, only thing that stopped me doing it is the thought of my wife or kids finding me in a pool of my own blood in the kitchen.

Never again.

 

[Mr Beast]

I know you don't want to hear it but I'm glad you're still with us brother, though our dealings over the many years I have learnt you're a top bloke.

I too tried to end it about 2 years ago, actually had a butchers knife to my throat, only thing that stopped me doing it is the thought of my wife or kids finding me in a pool of my own blood in the kitchen.

Never again.

Thanks bro I appreciate it sincerely.

Well I'm glad that never it didn't happen it would have been a tragedy for your family and kids.

Massive wake up call for me and I'm sure it was for u too being so close on giving up on life.

It's a cowards way out and I knew this, I was just being selfish rather than being selfless. Never again!

 

[Lady Emerald]

One of the strongest things you can overcome is wanting to end your life during the tough times.
It's good that you've realised what you need to do to overcome these challenges and what's life without them really?

Just remember when the going gets tough the tough gets going and once you start to pick up all the pieces you'll find that you can handle these obstacles a lot easier than what you did the last time.
Stay strong buddy, we're all here for you if you need a chat

 

[Alan79]

This is an absolutely brilliant thread.A burden shared is a burden halved and good on everyone for your input. We all have something in our life that we need to share with someone just to get it out of our systems.
I have struggled with depression in the past and it took the love of a good man and a supportive family to get me back on track.I stil have my moments but am managing well now without the need for medication ( which I have taken in the past).
Now my poor daughter God love her is struggling with constant bullying from her "peers" who seem to think that they are the be all and end all of things. She has been cutting ( I have had to take her pencil sharpeners off her as she has been removing the blades to use) and has expressed her feelings of worthlessness. She hates school and has lost that spark she had as a young child.We are getting her help both with alerting the school about the students involved and having them punished with suspensions etc.; She is under the care of a psychiatrist and medication.Hardly seems fair considering she is only a baby at 13. She is dealing with the inevitable hormone changes and other things that young people go through during puberty and she has to put up with this sort of crap.
I take heart from some of the life stories in this thread and I thank you all for sharing

I hope your daughter comes through this all as a stronger person than the pricks at her school who are treating her badly. Kids can be nasty when you have a few of them together. I'm glad your daughter is getting some professional help. I think it must be hard for a parent to not be able to help as much as they'd like but it sounds like you've done the right things.

Hey everyone, thought I'd share. Long story short I tired to end my life on Saturday I overdosed on Xanax took 17 to be exact. Wasn't feeling it with life and what not relationships, stress work etc. Everything compounded and I was selfish to have chosen to do what I did. With that said I was lucky someone was home to call the ambos I have no recollection or memory of what happened from the point of me swollen in them pills.

Point is I survived, got sent to hospital ICU then mental health clinic at concord hospital. After speaking with the psychiatrist they let me go.

Got home family cried and I felt guilt. Not so much hurting myself but hurting the ppl I love. Never again its not worth it. I would of case more pain towards ppl I love.

Anyways, I was going to share this as this is very personal but hey its the kennel we all share a lot of things on here.

I'm better now it's opened my eyes and my out look on life and the ppl that care.

Point is, if you're depressed speak to someone I'd recommend a psychiatrist, at first I was sceptical about them but fk me all my emotions came out and I felt better.

Not expecting the sorry to hear or glad you're okay just wanted to share and tell y'all there are ppl out there to help and support you professionally.

I think I'm a pretty healthy smart man, but fk you know what saying depression is a silent killer.

Wrote this raw unedited and on my phone

The kennel is the best and I'm happy to still be modding

There will probably be some uncomfortable moments with the family for a while since most of them have no idea how to feel, what to say or if they should be treating you differently, but i hope their support is able to get you through the tough times when they come in future. It sometimes feels like the manly thing to do to bottle up emotions but it feels like a huge weight lifts when you find some way to unload the burdens and let the emotion out. I hope you can avoid letting things build up in future Tonee.

 

[Lov_Dog]

Hey everyone, thought I'd share. Long story short I tired to end my life on Saturday I overdosed on Xanax took 17 to be exact. Wasn't feeling it with life and what not relationships, stress work etc. Everything compounded and I was selfish to have chosen to do what I did. With that said I was lucky someone was home to call the ambos I have no recollection or memory of what happened from the point of me swollen in them pills.

Point is I survived, got sent to hospital ICU then mental health clinic at concord hospital. After speaking with the psychiatrist they let me go.

Got home family cried and I felt guilt. Not so much hurting myself but hurting the ppl I love. Never again its not worth it. I would of case more pain towards ppl I love.

Anyways, I was going to share this as this is very personal but hey its the kennel we all share a lot of things on here.

I'm better now it's opened my eyes and my out look on life and the ppl that care.

Point is, if you're depressed speak to someone I'd recommend a psychiatrist, at first I was sceptical about them but fk me all my emotions came out and I felt better.

Not expecting the sorry to hear or glad you're okay just wanted to share and tell y'all there are ppl out there to help and support you professionally.

I think I'm a pretty healthy smart man, but fk you know what saying depression is a silent killer.

Wrote this raw unedited and on my phone

The kennel is the best and I'm happy to still be modding

Thank you for sharing tonee... and also for acknowledging that you've experienced an 'enlightenment' so to speak from this dark moment. Strength to you mi amigo!!

Depression and associated disorders are becoming very common-place in society with prevalence estimates in excess of 20%.
Thus, it's no wonder suicide remains the leading cause of death for Aussie's between teenage and 44.

Some time ago, I stumbled on a blog, that spoke to me;
http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com.au/2013/05/depression-part-two.html

for those reading this thread and experiencing depression-like symptoms, I sincerely wish you find your corn.

~cb

 

[Lady Emerald]

Woke up this morning and it has finally hit me. I said a while back that my grandmother has passed away and I was finding it hard to grieve, I'm finally grieving. It happened out of nowhere but I'm really missing her today :-(

 

[Hacky McAxe]

Woke up this morning and it has finally hit me. I said a while back that my grandmother has passed away and I was finding it hard to grieve, I'm finally grieving. It happened out of nowhere but I'm really missing her today :-(

I don't mean to sound cruel in any way but I'm glad you're finally grieving. It's the first step to moving on and it keeps it from building up inside.

 

[Hacky McAxe]

Hey everyone, thought I'd share. Long story short I tired to end my life on Saturday I overdosed on Xanax took 17 to be exact. Wasn't feeling it with life and what not relationships, stress work etc. Everything compounded and I was selfish to have chosen to do what I did. With that said I was lucky someone was home to call the ambos I have no recollection or memory of what happened from the point of me swollen in them pills.

Point is I survived, got sent to hospital ICU then mental health clinic at concord hospital. After speaking with the psychiatrist they let me go.

Got home family cried and I felt guilt. Not so much hurting myself but hurting the ppl I love. Never again its not worth it. I would of case more pain towards ppl I love.

Anyways, I was going to share this as this is very personal but hey its the kennel we all share a lot of things on here.

I'm better now it's opened my eyes and my out look on life and the ppl that care.

Point is, if you're depressed speak to someone I'd recommend a psychiatrist, at first I was sceptical about them but fk me all my emotions came out and I felt better.

Not expecting the sorry to hear or glad you're okay just wanted to share and tell y'all there are ppl out there to help and support you professionally.

I think I'm a pretty healthy smart man, but fk you know what saying depression is a silent killer.

Wrote this raw unedited and on my phone

The kennel is the best and I'm happy to still be modding

Glad you shared this Tone, it's a tough thing to go through. I've never tried to kill myself but I have gotten to the stage where I've wanted to try. I considered throwing myself off a building but then I decided that if I'm willing to die I won't kill myself, I'll just put myself in a situation where I will most likely die. Decided to go rock climbing without any equipment. Went to the Blue Mountains and by the time I have finally reached a good cliff to climb the urge had gone. Spent some time bushwalking and went home.

Keep in mind that while you may feel like you'd never do something like that again, all it takes is for something to change and you'll be back there again. That's why it's especially important to talk to people when it starts to build up.

I haven't been at that stage in a long time. Haven't reached the stage where I want to kill myself but every time I walk up to a high area (cliff, edge of a building, etc) I get an overwhelming urge to jump off. I actually have to move away from the edge fast 'cause it feels like something is going to take over my body and throw me off. I think I'm going to have to go bungie jumping or sky diving to get it out of my system.

 

[Lady Emerald]

I don't mean to sound cruel in any way but I'm glad you're finally grieving. It's the first step to moving on and it keeps it from building up inside.

Not cruel at all.
It's good to finally be able to grieve properly.
It just hurts. :-(

 

[Ecca]

Firstly - Please Blokes - Visit this site - https://www.mantherapy.org.au/

Lots of great stuff on there

Sorry Mrs - Blokes only - but we still care (psst - feel free to check it out too)

Regarding this;

Hey everyone, thought I'd share. Long story short I tired to end my life on Saturday I overdosed on Xanax took 17 to be exact. Wasn't feeling it with life and what not relationships, stress work etc. Everything compounded and I was selfish to have chosen to do what I did. With that said I was lucky someone was home to call the ambos I have no recollection or memory of what happened from the point of me swollen in them pills.

Point is I survived, got sent to hospital ICU then mental health clinic at concord hospital. After speaking with the psychiatrist they let me go.

Got home family cried and I felt guilt. Not so much hurting myself but hurting the ppl I love. Never again its not worth it. I would of case more pain towards ppl I love.

Anyways, I was going to share this as this is very personal but hey its the kennel we all share a lot of things on here.

I'm better now it's opened my eyes and my out look on life and the ppl that care.

Point is, if you're depressed speak to someone I'd recommend a psychiatrist, at first I was sceptical about them but fk me all my emotions came out and I felt better.

Not expecting the sorry to hear or glad you're okay just wanted to share and tell y'all there are ppl out there to help and support you professionally.

I think I'm a pretty healthy smart man, but fk you know what saying depression is a silent killer.

Wrote this raw unedited and on my phone

The kennel is the best and I'm happy to still be modding

I really do not believe there is anything relevant I can say in relation to this post, accept to recognise the absolute strength of character you showed in telling us all about it. Thank you.

 

[dogluva]

Woke up this morning and it has finally hit me. I said a while back that my grandmother has passed away and I was finding it hard to grieve, I'm finally grieving. It happened out of nowhere but I'm really missing her today :-(

Now is the time to begin your healing Mrs.Life can be hard and cruel but just be content in knowing in your heart and mind that you have no reason to feel badly about the way things transpired. We all deal with things in our own time and way as you have and shall. Family can be absolute pigs at times and agenda driven outcomes can be a real pain.Remember your grandmother fondly, the good times, the relationship you had with her and your obvious empathy in acknowledging her wishes relating to her voicing her thoughts for the way in which she preferred to leave this world.You seem like a really nice person and you should never ever have to apologise for the way you feel about things.Stay strong and remember your Bulldog family are here for you.

 

[Mr Beast]

One of the strongest things you can overcome is wanting to end your life during the tough times.
It's good that you've realised what you need to do to overcome these challenges and what's life without them really?

Just remember when the going gets tough the tough gets going and once you start to pick up all the pieces you'll find that you can handle these obstacles a lot easier than what you did the last time.
Stay strong buddy, we're all here for you if you need a chat

I hope your daughter comes through this all as a stronger person than the pricks at her school who are treating her badly. Kids can be nasty when you have a few of them together. I'm glad your daughter is getting some professional help. I think it must be hard for a parent to not be able to help as much as they'd like but it sounds like you've done the right things.




There will probably be some uncomfortable moments with the family for a while since most of them have no idea how to feel, what to say or if they should be treating you differently, but i hope their support is able to get you through the tough times when they come in future. It sometimes feels like the manly thing to do to bottle up emotions but it feels like a huge weight lifts when you find some way to unload the burdens and let the emotion out. I hope you can avoid letting things build up in future Tonee.

Thank you for sharing tonee... and also for acknowledging that you've experienced an 'enlightenment' so to speak from this dark moment. Strength to you mi amigo!!

Depression and associated disorders are becoming very common-place in society with prevalence estimates in excess of 20%.
Thus, it's no wonder suicide remains the leading cause of death for Aussie's between teenage and 44.

Some time ago, I stumbled on a blog, that spoke to me;
http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com.au/2013/05/depression-part-two.html

for those reading this thread and experiencing depression-like symptoms, I sincerely wish you find your corn.

~cb

Glad you shared this Tone, it's a tough thing to go through. I've never tried to kill myself but I have gotten to the stage where I've wanted to try. I considered throwing myself off a building but then I decided that if I'm willing to die I won't kill myself, I'll just put myself in a situation where I will most likely die. Decided to go rock climbing without any equipment. Went to the Blue Mountains and by the time I have finally reached a good cliff to climb the urge had gone. Spent some time bushwalking and went home.

Keep in mind that while you may feel like you'd never do something like that again, all it takes is for something to change and you'll be back there again. That's why it's especially important to talk to people when it starts to build up.

I haven't been at that stage in a long time. Haven't reached the stage where I want to kill myself but every time I walk up to a high area (cliff, edge of a building, etc) I get an overwhelming urge to jump off. I actually have to move away from the edge fast 'cause it feels like something is going to take over my body and throw me off. I think I'm going to have to go bungie jumping or sky diving to get it out of my system.

Thank you to all that read my post and acknowledged my words.

I'm still going through depression. What's sad is that I can't find happiness.

Even though I knew I would hurt ppl around me more so than just myself, im still suffering from this depression.

I spent CNY with my family and I was still miserable, even though I knew my family loved me it wasn't enough.

It's the most fkd up feeling, I can't put my mind in the right mind set to get out of this state. I know I wouldn't try do do it again, because of the ramifications that will impact the ones closest to me.

I just feel like I'm a lost, dead soul walking this earth.

 

[Natboy]

I just read this now. I am sorry to hear you're in such a dark place Tonee. It is good you feel you wouldn't do it again because of your family.
Sometimes it takes something so ****ed up to make you wake up.
I hope the feeling goes away quickly! Maybe the dogs will make you smile again soon
Wishing you all the best mate and please seek some help if you even think about doing something like that again!

 

[south of heaven]

Thank you to all that read my post and acknowledged my words.

I'm still going through depression. What's sad is that I can't find happiness.

Even though I knew I would hurt ppl around me more so than just myself, im still suffering from this depression.

I spent CNY with my family and I was still miserable, even though I knew my family loved me it wasn't enough.

It's the most fkd up feeling, I can't put my mind in the right mind set to get out of this state. I know I wouldn't try do do it again, because of the ramifications that will impact the ones closest to me.

I just feel like I'm a lost, dead soul walking this earth.

Hang in there brother , you can beat it give yourself time. I know it does not mean shit when you're feeling this way.. just hang in there.

 

[Owey]

Thank you to all that read my post and acknowledged my words.

I'm still going through depression. What's sad is that I can't find happiness.

Even though I knew I would hurt ppl around me more so than just myself, im still suffering from this depression.

I spent CNY with my family and I was still miserable, even though I knew my family loved me it wasn't enough.

It's the most fkd up feeling, I can't put my mind in the right mind set to get out of this state. I know I wouldn't try do do it again, because of the ramifications that will impact the ones closest to me.

I just feel like I'm a lost, dead soul walking this earth.

Kudos to you Tonee - I have been on the other side of such pain, losing the all too special loved one to the darkness. You have had the courage to see that your family deserves better than having to remember you from afar and continuously asking what it was that they could have done differently to perhaps maybe keep you around.

Not a day goes past that I wish my father was still with us, seeing his grand kids born and grow, seeing his kids achieve their goals. But alas, he chose a different path to the one you have chosen. And with those passing days that I wish he was here, each and every one of them, I ask myself "Was it something I done, maybe if I did something different he would still be here".

I wish you the best in your ongoing battles with depression. I don't think it is something that you beat, just something you manage. But you have certainly taken a step forward in that battle. As the great James Graham says - "Run again, son".

 

[Lady Emerald]

Numb is the best way to put how I feel today.
Was in hospital all night. My husband and I have been trying to have a baby for about 8 months now. Little to my knowledge, I was infact pregnant. I found out last night when I had a miscarriage.
So no, I'm not okay. I'm at home sulking and thinking why we can't be blessed with a child. :-(

 

[Ecca]

Numb is the best way to put how I feel today.
Was in hospital all night. My husband and I have been trying to have a baby for about 8 months now. Little to my knowledge, I was infact pregnant. I found out last night when I had a miscarriage.
So no, I'm not okay. I'm at home sulking and thinking why we can't be blessed with a child. :-(

***HUGS***, I'm sorry for your loss, no words can help at this time, take care.

 

[Hacky McAxe]

Numb is the best way to put how I feel today.
Was in hospital all night. My husband and I have been trying to have a baby for about 8 months now. Little to my knowledge, I was infact pregnant. I found out last night when I had a miscarriage.
So no, I'm not okay. I'm at home sulking and thinking why we can't be blessed with a child. :-(

Sorry to hear about it. I've been through it twice and it doesn't get any easier. It's even worse for my mrs. We've both been so angry but you just need to get back on the horse (no pun intended) and keep trying. One day it'll work out for all of us.

 

[Lady Emerald]

***HUGS***, I'm sorry for your loss, no words can help at this time, take care.

Thank you Ecca. Cyber hugs can help, much appreciated