My husband does not post here on the kennel but he does enjoy reading the posts and taking in the discussions from everyone. He has heard me talk of Assassin, SOH, Drop Bear, Trendsetter and so many others who have touched my heart and kept me coming back to the forum to read their thoughts and just to see how they are doing. So, as he picked me up from school this afternoon the first thing he said to me was " You need to go on the kennel when you get home because one of your mates who posts there is in a bad way. It is not good news, there is talk of last post and cancer and from someone who has been a fan of the club for just a few more years than you. Can't remember the name...."
I was not looking forward to reading this thread, nor learning the identity of the poster. When I saw that name Izzy Forreal, my head spun.
Izzy, I have always appreciated the input you have made to the kennel and your contribution to some very interesting and lively debates. Reading the messages from others here show that they feel the same and I am not lying when I say that I read your post and their responses with a tear in my eye. Like many, we have never met and it is hard to get a handle on someone as a person when you have never seen them face to face. The only connection we have is that of a footy team, something constant and important in out lives. I still like to think of those who post here as friends due to their love of the same footy team.
Absolutely devastating news to have been given and so many conflicting emotions must be going through you at the moment. Life is fleeting and precious and in some way we always hope that we can be bulletproof and ten foot tall, but that is not the way things work as you have so unfortunately found out.
You speak of the 55 years of support to the Bulldogs; a lifetime of highs and lows, the good and the bad the happy and the sad, but even now at this moment I reckon you still have the passion for the game even if you don't feel you do.
What you chose to do is entirely up to you and really none of us have the right to tell you how you should spend whatever time you have left. Your life, your rules, your choice. What I will say though and I am sure others will agree is that we hold you dear to our hearts and you will always be welcome to continue to post here about anything for as long as you chose and are able; the way you feel, the things you want to do, anything even if it is not about footy.
"Experts" are usually right, but they can also be wrong to an extent. Look at Assassin! Case in point.
As long as you feel able and as long as you have strength, don't give up on things. Everyday things like going for a walk, reading a book, seeing a movie give us a focus point that can give us much joy and satisfaction. Footy is not the end all and be all but it will still play a part in your life. Do what you like when you like, make some good new memories for the family.
You say that you are copping the cancer sweet, the acceptance phase of such things in life, meaning that you have gone through period of the diagnosis and the effect on you and your family, the next stage where you all come together to try and resolve things in a unified way and then onto the anger, guilt and sometimes even a resentment of the way things are going. Takes a special person to cope with that and takes a brave person to come out as you have with something so personal.
I wish you nothing less than peace and tranquillity, happiness and laughter. Keep close to family and friends and fight the good fight.