- Joined
- Sep 2, 2012
- Messages
- 108,327
- Reaction score
- 121,571
The black dog bites the best and strongest of us at times...
Thank You for sharing bro, brave of you.I haven't been down that dark road and don't even know if I've ever really experienced true depression.
But from June 2021 until Christmas Eve my struggles peaked. It was a really shit time and I just felt empty, even with my 18month old son at the time who brightened our lives, I still didn't feel 'normal'.
Thankfully I'm feeling better now and slowing working on getting my shit back together...
I guess what I'm trying to say is that I can't comprehend what people like Greeny and others that have become suicidal must have been feeling. That empty feeling i experienced was horrible and I wasn't suicidal at all...
It's easy to give advice to others without practicing what you preach. I too am guilty of this... But please speak up if you aren't feeling yourself, we have the R U OK thread on here and we should all be looking out to reduce the stigma of mental health.
RIP Paul Green.
No problem at all. No matter where your problem may be on the spectrum, sharing may encourage someone else to speak up.Thank You for sharing bro, brave of you.
Maybe one day I'll tell my encounter of that fkn black dog that lurks around.
You make a good point.No problem at all. No matter where your problem may be on the spectrum, sharing may encourage someone else to speak up.
As you know mate we are all here to listen if ever needed.
God bless you mate. No faith No hope.You make a good point.
I was sick for 4 and a half years at that point. Was still waiting for a heart. Every second of every day was painful, taking half second breaths, struggling to breathe as the old heart was so big I only had 2% use of my left lung and 7% use of my right lung.
Couldn't walk without a walking stick or walker, obviously couldn't work to provide for my wife and two young kids. I never even thought of suicide as an option as I am a fighter and hate quitting.
One day I was preparing some snacks for the kids when they came home from school and all over the sudden I put the knife to my neck (hard enough to break skin), I wasn't thinking at all and all I can describe it as I was possessed by a demon.
Don't know how long I was there but the worst shit was going through my head, couldn't think, talk or internally talk. Somehow I managed to internally say "help me Jesus". At first i thought it didnt work. Then all of a sudden i "heard" someone say "who will clean up the blood, your wife or kids?". That's what broke my "trance", made me snap out of it instantly.
I instantly dropped the knife and collapsed. When I came to I managed to get on my knees and pray. That was it. Never thought of suicide again and nobody in real life knows this story.
First time I actually talk about it. Don't want sympathy or anything, just like you mentioned, if this helps someone then it's worth breaking my silence.
Please speak up and don't be a stubborn hard **** like I was. We are all human and we are allowed to have feelings.
God bless you All.
Brave of you to share brother, especially being the first time talking about it.You make a good point.
I was sick for 4 and a half years at that point. Was still waiting for a heart. Every second of every day was painful, taking half second breaths, struggling to breathe as the old heart was so big I only had 2% use of my left lung and 7% use of my right lung.
Couldn't walk without a walking stick or walker, obviously couldn't work to provide for my wife and two young kids. I never even thought of suicide as an option as I am a fighter and hate quitting.
One day I was preparing some snacks for the kids when they came home from school and all over the sudden I put the knife to my neck (hard enough to break skin), I wasn't thinking at all and all I can describe it as I was possessed by a demon.
Don't know how long I was there but the worst shit was going through my head, couldn't think, talk or internally talk. Somehow I managed to internally say "help me Jesus". At first i thought it didnt work. Then all of a sudden i "heard" someone say "who will clean up the blood, your wife or kids?".
I instantly dropped the knife and collapsed. When I came to I managed to get on my knees and pray. That was it. Never thought of suicide again and nobody in real life knows this story.
First time I actually talk about it. Don't want sympathy or anything, just like you mentioned, if this helps someone then it's worth breaking my silence.
Please speak up and don't be a stubborn hard **** like I was. We are all human and we are allowed to have feelings.
God bless you All.
If you didn't mention it might help someone I wouldn't of talked, tbh I never thought about that.Brave of you to share brother, especially being the first time talking about it.
Can't imagine how hard that would have been to experience that frozen helpless feeling... the parallel to possession is something I've heard before. Happy to hear you haven't experienced it again.
Hopefully encourages more people to get stuff off their chest. But no not stupid at all brother.If you didn't mention it might help someone I wouldn't of talked, tbh I never thought about that.
May sound stupid but that moment of weakness has made me stronger.
Fuck offMiners from China
All equipment will be shipped from our warehouses in Shenzhen China. Additional shipping charges apply to orders shipping to international destinations.
ANEXMINER ET5 ETH MINER PROFIT 56 $ DAY
2022 Anexminer ET5 ETC 6G Second-Hand - APEXTOMINER
Model STU-U1++ from StrongU mining Blake256R14 algorithm with a maximum hashrate of 52Th/s for a power consumption of 2200Wapextominer.org
ANEXMINER ET3
Anexminer ET3 ETC Miner 300Mh/S 6G - Second-hand - APEXTOMINER
Model STU-U1++ from StrongU mining Blake256R14 algorithm with a maximum hashrate of 52Th/s for a power consumption of 2200Wapextominer.org
WORLD DELIVERY 3-7 DAYS
2 dollar pippyFuck off
Hey Champ, I hardly get time for TK & I remember your tuff times from back then. Its great to hear your kicking on & doing well. All the best!You make a good point.
I was sick for 4 and a half years at that point. Was still waiting for a heart. Every second of every day was painful, taking half second breaths, struggling to breathe as the old heart was so big I only had 2% use of my left lung and 7% use of my right lung.
Couldn't walk without a walking stick or walker, obviously couldn't work to provide for my wife and two young kids. I never even thought of suicide as an option as I am a fighter and hate quitting.
One day I was preparing some snacks for the kids when they came home from school and all over the sudden I put the knife to my neck (hard enough to break skin), I wasn't thinking at all and all I can describe it as I was possessed by a demon.
Don't know how long I was there but the worst shit was going through my head, couldn't think, talk or internally talk. Somehow I managed to internally say "help me Jesus". At first i thought it didnt work. Then all of a sudden i "heard" someone say "who will clean up the blood, your wife or kids?". That's what broke my "trance", made me snap out of it instantly.
I instantly dropped the knife and collapsed. When I came to I managed to get on my knees and pray. That was it. Never thought of suicide again and nobody in real life knows this story.
First time I actually talk about it. Don't want sympathy or anything, just like you mentioned, if this helps someone then it's worth breaking my silence.
Please speak up and don't be a stubborn hard **** like I was. We are all human and we are allowed to have feelings.
God bless you All.
Stoof! Blast from the past. Good to see you again my bro.Hey Champ, I hardly get time for TK & I remember your tuff times from back then. Its great to hear your kicking on & doing well. All the best!
Keep fighting soldier. God bless you and give you strenght.Im doing good. Ive had bowel cancer & Im still kicking. Im not giving up!
Im glad your doing well. It gives us all strength!Stoof! Blast from the past. Good to see you again my bro.
Yeah I'm still here my bro. God doesn't want me, Satan doesn't want me, looks like you humans are still stuck with me lol
How you been? Hope to see you more often on here.
What lowlife circulates this stuff no respect for the family. So he gassed himself ??Apparently the video of the cops finding him in the garage is doing the rounds....
Hope it's gets deleted for the family's sake.
Scumbags from the cops must leaked it to other scumbags.What lowlife circulates this stuff no respect for the family. So he gassed himself ??
Bro I thought his wife found him?Apparently the video of the cops finding him in the garage is doing the rounds.... I haven't seen it and I won't be saying what it showed.
Hope it's gets deleted for the family's sake.