JayBee
Kennel Legend
- Joined
- Feb 23, 2005
- Messages
- 10,794
- Reaction score
- 4,029
On West Ham striker John Hartson:
"John Hartson's got more previous than Jack the Ripper."
On West Ham's Ivory Coast striker Samassi Abou:
"He don't speak the English too good."
And there's more...
"The lad [Abou] went home to the Ivory Coast and got a bit of food poisoning. He must have eaten a dodgy missionary or something."
On tactics:
"I sorted out the team formation last night lying in bed with the wife. When your husband's as ugly as me, you'd only want to talk football in bed."
On a training ground bust-up between West Ham players Alvin Martin and Matthew Rush:
"I've seen better fights at a wedding."
On West Ham's UEFA Cup chances:
"Where are we in relation to Europe? Not too far from Dover."
On his time as a West Ham winger in the '60s:
"Even when we had Moore, Hurst and Peters, West Ham's average finish was about 17th. Which just shows how crap the other eight of us were."
On signing pretty boy 'Portugeezer' winger Dani:
"My missus fancies him. Even I don't know whether to play him or f**k him."
On under-performing foreign signings:
"With the foreigners it's more difficult. Most of them don't even bother with the golf, they don't want to go racing. They don't even drink."
On the danger of signing players from videos:
"I tape over most of them with Corrie or Neighbours. Most of them are crap. They can f***ing make anyone look good. I signed Marco Boogers off a video. He was a good player but a nutter. They didn't show that on the video."
On missing out on the signing of a global superstar he had on trial at Upton Park:
"Andrei Shevchenko didn't pull up any trees."
On Southampton striker Kenwyne Jones:
“He took a knock on his ankle but we played him some Bob Marley reggae music and he was fine.”
On wayward Tottenham striker Darren Bent:
“You will never get a better chance to win a match than that. My missus could have scored that one.”
On even more wayward Portsmouth striker Benjani:
“After shooting practise yesterday, I had to drive up the M27 and collect four balls.”
On Iain Dowie:
"By the look of him he must have headed a lot of balls"
On referee Steve Tanner (in 2008):
“I never walk in after games and complain about a referee but this guy is scary.”
On Arsenal being reduced to 10 men against Southampton:
“Van Persie obviously thought ‘why take the piss out of poor old Southampton? I’ll get sent off and make a game of it’.”
On England's World Cup 2010 campaign:
“The future for England looks a bit scary to me. No one should kid themselves England are overloaded with fantastic talent coming through. They’re not.”
On wheeler dealing:
“The sad part is that the ones who do well want to go, but you cannot move the ones who are useless.”
On being a wheeler and dealer:
"No, I'm not a wheeler and dealer. F**k off. I'm not a wheeler and f*****g dealer. Don't even say that. I'm a f*****g football manager."
Read more: http://www.mirrorfootball.co.uk/opi...bou-and-more-article619193.html#ixzz1WYyl1rx1
Sign up for MirrorFootball's Morning Spy newsletter Register here
"John Hartson's got more previous than Jack the Ripper."
On West Ham's Ivory Coast striker Samassi Abou:
"He don't speak the English too good."
And there's more...
"The lad [Abou] went home to the Ivory Coast and got a bit of food poisoning. He must have eaten a dodgy missionary or something."
On tactics:
"I sorted out the team formation last night lying in bed with the wife. When your husband's as ugly as me, you'd only want to talk football in bed."
On a training ground bust-up between West Ham players Alvin Martin and Matthew Rush:
"I've seen better fights at a wedding."
On West Ham's UEFA Cup chances:
"Where are we in relation to Europe? Not too far from Dover."
On his time as a West Ham winger in the '60s:
"Even when we had Moore, Hurst and Peters, West Ham's average finish was about 17th. Which just shows how crap the other eight of us were."
On signing pretty boy 'Portugeezer' winger Dani:
"My missus fancies him. Even I don't know whether to play him or f**k him."
On under-performing foreign signings:
"With the foreigners it's more difficult. Most of them don't even bother with the golf, they don't want to go racing. They don't even drink."
On the danger of signing players from videos:
"I tape over most of them with Corrie or Neighbours. Most of them are crap. They can f***ing make anyone look good. I signed Marco Boogers off a video. He was a good player but a nutter. They didn't show that on the video."
On missing out on the signing of a global superstar he had on trial at Upton Park:
"Andrei Shevchenko didn't pull up any trees."
On Southampton striker Kenwyne Jones:
“He took a knock on his ankle but we played him some Bob Marley reggae music and he was fine.”
On wayward Tottenham striker Darren Bent:
“You will never get a better chance to win a match than that. My missus could have scored that one.”
On even more wayward Portsmouth striker Benjani:
“After shooting practise yesterday, I had to drive up the M27 and collect four balls.”
On Iain Dowie:
"By the look of him he must have headed a lot of balls"
On referee Steve Tanner (in 2008):
“I never walk in after games and complain about a referee but this guy is scary.”
On Arsenal being reduced to 10 men against Southampton:
“Van Persie obviously thought ‘why take the piss out of poor old Southampton? I’ll get sent off and make a game of it’.”
On England's World Cup 2010 campaign:
“The future for England looks a bit scary to me. No one should kid themselves England are overloaded with fantastic talent coming through. They’re not.”
On wheeler dealing:
“The sad part is that the ones who do well want to go, but you cannot move the ones who are useless.”
On being a wheeler and dealer:
"No, I'm not a wheeler and dealer. F**k off. I'm not a wheeler and f*****g dealer. Don't even say that. I'm a f*****g football manager."
Read more: http://www.mirrorfootball.co.uk/opi...bou-and-more-article619193.html#ixzz1WYyl1rx1
Sign up for MirrorFootball's Morning Spy newsletter Register here
