Coronavirus.

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south of heaven

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I've cracked it.
The virus was clearly created by women. Think about it:

1) Sport grinding to a halt
2) Pubs will close
3) 14 Day Quarantine (so you have no excuse to put off jobs around the house any longer)
4) Symptoms are flu like (they know it's our Kryptonite)
5) The had the audacity to name it after a beer

Sheesh...
New data released by NSW Health when the number of cases in the state was at 210 shows that the majority of cases in the state are from women aged 30 to 39.
Joseph fritzel was right women need to kept in a cellar
 

The DoggFather

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I've cracked it.
The virus was clearly created by women. Think about it:

1) Sport grinding to a halt
2) Pubs will close
3) 14 Day Quarantine (so you have no excuse to put off jobs around the house any longer)
4) Symptoms are flu like (they know it's our Kryptonite)
5) The had the audacity to name it after a beer

Sheesh...
Plus it's named after a girls beer also
 

steve1700

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Glad I picked Perth over Sydney must be be crazy there now.
 

JUNKYARD DOGS

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Have they suspended any other junior sports like soccer or basketball?
My daughters netball has been canned for at least a month, they can’t even have training. Juniors and seniors etc.

My Basketball grand final cancelled this week. That’s juniors and all grades in general.

Junior Footy up here also suspended.

Intrust.

Pretty much everything bar NRL I believe....
 

Packstar

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My daughters netball has been canned for at least a month, they can’t even have training.

My Basketball grand final cancelled this week.

Junior Footy up here also suspended.

Intrust.

Pretty much everything bar NRL I believe....
NRL consists of very "special" people
 

Wahesh

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Marrickville Coles Totally Out Of Typewriters And Vintage Suitcases, As Panic Buying Continues
By The Shovel on March 18, 2020

Stores in Sydney’s inner west and Melbourne’s inner north are experiencing a shortage of essentials including vintage suitcases, ukuleles and VHS tapes, as panic buying continues across the country.

In one store in Fitzroy the pennyfarthing aisle had been shopped bare. “It’s been pretty crazy here to be honest,” store owner Herbert Ingles said. “We’re totally out of ironic tote bags and we’re even running low on gramophones now. It’s ridiculous,” he said.

He said his store had done 7 week’s worth of small-batch boutique bourbon kit sales in just one day.

“My message to everyone is to just be calm – there are enough hand-crafted leather aprons for everyone”.

Archibald Reece, a storeowner in Marrickville, said they wouldn’t have more Casio calculator watches in stock for at least 14 days. His store has implemented a limit of one cassette tape per customer policy until further notice. “All I’d say is, think about those vulnerable people in your community who need a bespoke cobbler tool set more than you do”.
Whoever writes these has too much time on their hands. Funny as, but too much time on their hands. Did you see the GWS AFL one? I lost my shit laughing.
 

south of heaven

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Personally I can't wait for Americans to have shoot outs in car parks over toilet paper
 

KambahOne

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I've cracked it.
The virus was clearly created by women. Think about it:

1) Sport grinding to a halt
2) Pubs will close
3) 14 Day Quarantine (so you have no excuse to put off jobs around the house any longer)
4) Symptoms are flu like (they know it's our Kryptonite)
5) The had the audacity to name it after a beer

Sheesh...
That is some 007 level investigation done right there! If this virus was created by a man it would develop a protein deficiency in woman that can only be alleviated by ingesting spermatozoa orally. The incubation period would be 10-15 years and laws would be enacted where men would be forced to allow any woman to give them a blowjob at any time anywhere. It would against the law for your partner to object to a woman wanting to suck your balls dry to alleviate the virus symptoms and there would no synthetic substitute.
 

south of heaven

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If Italy has over 2500 dead I wonder what the true Chinese and Iranian count would be
 

DinkumDog

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Personally I can't wait for Americans to have shoot outs in car parks over toilet paper
Oh it's coming - did you see the news story about Los Angelenos lining up at gun stores?
What a novel idea - shoot the virus. And if not the virus, each other.
I say leave it to Walker Texas Ranger - he'll karate the shit out of anything.
 

Hacky McAxe

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How is this possible?
Exactly what Assassin said. Incubation period can be up to 2 weeks. Even then, in full lockdown people are still allowed to leave their houses for certain reasons. Any any interaction poses a risk of infection.
 

Hacky McAxe

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Where do they get the 6 month term from? Surely it would be re-assessed every so often??

I can’t imagine anything worse than being locked up with my wife and kids for that long
It's exponential Development. Basically put, regardless of what measures are put in place this will still be around for at least 6 months. So there wouldn't be a period where it's safe to stop the school shut down.

BTW, 6 months is the bare minimum and also highly unlikely. It's more likely that it'll be 12 months.

Another problem with it is that the virus is still around to some capacity. Experts have pointed out this issue with Italy and China. As long as families are together and as long as there's still some services running then the virus will keep circulating. End the lockdown in 3 months time and the infected numbers explode again.
 

Hacky McAxe

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Oh it's coming - did you see the news story about Los Angelenos lining up at gun stores?
What a novel idea - shoot the virus. And if not the virus, each other.
I say leave it to Walker Texas Ranger - he'll karate the shit out of anything.
 

CroydonDog

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Oh it's coming - did you see the news story about Los Angelenos lining up at gun stores?
What a novel idea - shoot the virus. And if not the virus, each other.
I say leave it to Walker Texas Ranger - he'll karate the shit out of anything.
If you scroll up a couple of pages, there is some Chuck Norris-related discussion.
 
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