Opinion Furner for head coach

[chisdog]

Whoa relax fellas.

You missed my first line.

You think I seriously believe that Furner should be anywhere near a FG coaching gig again, let alone with the Dogs?

Or that Gould should sack Barrett?

I’m taking the piss from stats in a centrespread story in today’s Tele.

Thought it might be good for a laugh as an alternative to the Sunday comics for the kids.

Next time post the story for context. We are pretty quick on the draw here to draw & quarter people.

 

[Bazildog]

As we head rapidly towards the silly season with nothing useful to discuss for months, here’s a stat to mull over…

Old man Bennett has coached against 106 first grade rivals. Against most he has a strong winning record. 31 have never beaten Bennett in a single match( including Jack Gibson,Roy Masters and…sigh! Teddy Glossop).

Not surprisingly, Bellamy stands out as an exception to the rule, with a phenomenal 74.4% win record over Bennett across 39 games.

But whose record is even better than Bellamy’s?
Better than 74.4%? Is it possible?
Surely not Hasler? The Wok? Bozo Fulton?

Nope. None of these.

It’s none other than our distinguished assistant defensive coach, David Furner.
He’s pipped Bellyache at a dizzying 75%.

Only 8 games you say? Small sample size?

Rubbish! Naysayers! It’s time for Gus (his own win record of 52.7% dwarfed pitifully by the son of Don) to face the uncomfortable truth…Barrett (a solitary win and a woeful 16.7%) has to make way, and Furner be given the keys to The Kennel.

Discuss.

It’s an informative post mate and interesting to read but I hope your tongue is firmly planted in your cheek with regards to Furner..

 

[_BT_]

As we head rapidly towards the silly season with nothing useful to discuss for months, here’s a stat to mull over…

Old man Bennett has coached against 106 first grade rivals. Against most he has a strong winning record. 31 have never beaten Bennett in a single match( including Jack Gibson,Roy Masters and…sigh! Teddy Glossop).

Not surprisingly, Bellamy stands out as an exception to the rule, with a phenomenal 74.4% win record over Bennett across 39 games.

But whose record is even better than Bellamy’s?
Better than 74.4%? Is it possible?
Surely not Hasler? The Wok? Bozo Fulton?

Nope. None of these.

It’s none other than our distinguished assistant defensive coach, David Furner.
He’s pipped Bellyache at a dizzying 75%.

Only 8 games you say? Small sample size?

Rubbish! Naysayers! It’s time for Gus (his own win record of 52.7% dwarfed pitifully by the son of Don) to face the uncomfortable truth…Barrett (a solitary win and a woeful 16.7%) has to make way, and Furner be given the keys to The Kennel.

Discuss.

Welcome to the Kennel David.

 

[steeliz]

Got a nibble…

Straight out of the Philosophy 101 textbook is that answer came from.

 

[steeliz]

Whoa relax fellas.

You missed my first line.

You think I seriously believe that Furner should be anywhere near a FG coaching gig again, let alone with the Dogs?

Or that Gould should sack Barrett?

I’m taking the piss from stats in a centrespread story in today’s Tele.

Thought it might be good for a laugh as an alternative to the Sunday comics for the kids.

You paid for the Tele?

That explains a lot.

 

[Psycho Doggie]

You paid for the Tele?

That explains a lot.

Yeah but seems like mostly for the comics

 

[Scoooby]

Muppet.!!

 

[Dyldog]

Yeah nah

 

[childofglossop]

Next time post the story for context. We are pretty quick on the draw here to draw & quarter people.

Thanks for the tip Chisdog.

A calm voice amongst the outrage!

Wow! I honestly expected the participants in this forum to recognise satire when it was so bleedingly obvious.

I was channeling Rampaging Roy Slaven…but clearly my efforts at creating a humorous thread suggest I should stick to my day job.

I still can’t quite believe how many seem to think it was a genuine opinion piece.

Maybe it’s because the default setting here is straight up rant.

You’re right Chisdog…a link to the article would have made it clearer that it was a simplistic list of stats without any meaningful attempt at analysis.
You know what they say - lies, damned lies and statistics!

And Dave Furner, if you’re reading this…back to work, you’ve got a helluva job on your hands getting our defence up to scratch.

 

[Stoofy]

Nice cast with a beach rod

Whoa relax fellas.

You missed my first line.

You think I seriously believe that Furner should be anywhere near a FG coaching gig again, let alone with the Dogs?

Or that Gould should sack Barrett?

I’m taking the piss from stats in a centrespread story in today’s Tele.

Thought it might be good for a laugh as an alternative to the Sunday comics for the kids.

 

[albatross]

Maybe co-coaches could work. That way Barrett can learn a bit from Furner the master before he's poached to replace Bellamy.

As we head rapidly towards the silly season with nothing useful to discuss for months, here’s a stat to mull over…

Old man Bennett has coached against 106 first grade rivals. Against most he has a strong winning record. 31 have never beaten Bennett in a single match( including Jack Gibson,Roy Masters and…sigh! Teddy Glossop).

Not surprisingly, Bellamy stands out as an exception to the rule, with a phenomenal 74.4% win record over Bennett across 39 games.

But whose record is even better than Bellamy’s?
Better than 74.4%? Is it possible?
Surely not Hasler? The Wok? Bozo Fulton?

Nope. None of these.

It’s none other than our distinguished assistant defensive coach, David Furner.
He’s pipped Bellyache at a dizzying 75%.

Only 8 games you say? Small sample size?

Rubbish! Naysayers! It’s time for Gus (his own win record of 52.7% dwarfed pitifully by the son of Don) to face the uncomfortable truth…Barrett (a solitary win and a woeful 16.7%) has to make way, and Furner be given the keys to The Kennel.

Discuss.

Maybe co-coaches could work. That way Barrett can learn a bit from Furner the master before he's poached to replace Bellamy.

 

[D- voice]

As we head rapidly towards the silly season with nothing useful to discuss for months, here’s a stat to mull over…

Old man Bennett has coached against 106 first grade rivals. Against most he has a strong winning record. 31 have never beaten Bennett in a single match( including Jack Gibson,Roy Masters and…sigh! Teddy Glossop).

Not surprisingly, Bellamy stands out as an exception to the rule, with a phenomenal 74.4% win record over Bennett across 39 games.

But whose record is even better than Bellamy’s?
Better than 74.4%? Is it possible?
Surely not Hasler? The Wok? Bozo Fulton?

Nope. None of these.

It’s none other than our distinguished assistant defensive coach, David Furner.
He’s pipped Bellyache at a dizzying 75%.

Only 8 games you say? Small sample size?

Rubbish! Naysayers! It’s time for Gus (his own win record of 52.7% dwarfed pitifully by the son of Don) to face the uncomfortable truth…Barrett (a solitary win and a woeful 16.7%) has to make way, and Furner be given the keys to The Kennel.

Discuss.

I recon he is lucky to be an assistant coach

 

[Kung fu man]

 

[Kung fu man]

Who was his defence coach we can skip Furner and just get him

 

[Doggy71]

Leave April fools day jokes for April.

 

[Wahesh]

As we head rapidly towards the silly season with nothing useful to discuss for months, here’s a stat to mull over…

Old man Bennett has coached against 106 first grade rivals. Against most he has a strong winning record. 31 have never beaten Bennett in a single match( including Jack Gibson,Roy Masters and…sigh! Teddy Glossop).

Not surprisingly, Bellamy stands out as an exception to the rule, with a phenomenal 74.4% win record over Bennett across 39 games.

But whose record is even better than Bellamy’s?
Better than 74.4%? Is it possible?
Surely not Hasler? The Wok? Bozo Fulton?

Nope. None of these.

It’s none other than our distinguished assistant defensive coach, David Furner.
He’s pipped Bellyache at a dizzying 75%.

Only 8 games you say? Small sample size?

Rubbish! Naysayers! It’s time for Gus (his own win record of 52.7% dwarfed pitifully by the son of Don) to face the uncomfortable truth…Barrett (a solitary win and a woeful 16.7%) has to make way, and Furner be given the keys to The Kennel.

Discuss.

Mate... you, me, and Blind Freddy next door would have a record as good as Bellamy if we breached the cap with the players he rorted to have at his disposal.

 

[The DoggFather]

As we head rapidly towards the silly season with nothing useful to discuss for months, here’s a stat to mull over…

Old man Bennett has coached against 106 first grade rivals. Against most he has a strong winning record. 31 have never beaten Bennett in a single match( including Jack Gibson,Roy Masters and…sigh! Teddy Glossop).

Not surprisingly, Bellamy stands out as an exception to the rule, with a phenomenal 74.4% win record over Bennett across 39 games.

But whose record is even better than Bellamy’s?
Better than 74.4%? Is it possible?
Surely not Hasler? The Wok? Bozo Fulton?

Nope. None of these.

It’s none other than our distinguished assistant defensive coach, David Furner.
He’s pipped Bellyache at a dizzying 75%.

Only 8 games you say? Small sample size?

Rubbish! Naysayers! It’s time for Gus (his own win record of 52.7% dwarfed pitifully by the son of Don) to face the uncomfortable truth…Barrett (a solitary win and a woeful 16.7%) has to make way, and Furner be given the keys to The Kennel.

Discuss.

 

[Matthew G]

As we head rapidly towards the silly season with nothing useful to discuss for months, here’s a stat to mull over…

Old man Bennett has coached against 106 first grade rivals. Against most he has a strong winning record. 31 have never beaten Bennett in a single match( including Jack Gibson,Roy Masters and…sigh! Teddy Glossop).

Not surprisingly, Bellamy stands out as an exception to the rule, with a phenomenal 74.4% win record over Bennett across 39 games.

But whose record is even better than Bellamy’s?
Better than 74.4%? Is it possible?
Surely not Hasler? The Wok? Bozo Fulton?

Nope. None of these.

It’s none other than our distinguished assistant defensive coach, David Furner.
He’s pipped Bellyache at a dizzying 75%.

Only 8 games you say? Small sample size?

Rubbish! Naysayers! It’s time for Gus (his own win record of 52.7% dwarfed pitifully by the son of Don) to face the uncomfortable truth…Barrett (a solitary win and a woeful 16.7%) has to make way, and Furner be given the keys to The Kennel.

Discuss.

This the same bloke who went to Super League and was the worst coach over there?

 

[From the area]

Did you see our defence this year? Bellamy would tear us apart next year if he’s the head coach.

 

[Dogtime]

Gould is looking to replace him with a defensive coach of better note. Pays name has come up. Our defensive structures have been pitiful this year. Hasn't coped with the rule changes. Must get better.