The "R U OK ?" Thread

[Wolfmother]

Soh do you know what caused the anxiety? Did that help with your recovery?
Good on you for taking charge of the demons. it would've taken a massive leap to get where you are now.

 

[Nano]

i'll probably admit i have a slight depression as well, feeling a bit useless as university isn't working out so good for me, been getting ignored by "the one", and been applying for 100's of jobs only to be rejected and not returned to over several occasions. Not exactly sure what i'm doing wrong, considering most of my friends have gotten into the jobs that i want, it just seems really impossible for me, feeling a bit lost tbh but yeah definitely not on the extreme part of depression yet, as i don't see myself ending my life, but have had thoughts of it (not seriously tho)

and when opportunities do arise, i find myself missing out (out of my control) e.g. had an interview for a job that i wanted, left to go which was in parramatta coming from canterbury area, i'd need to take the m4 and excatly on that day a person had got run over by a truck in the james ruse exit (the one i needed to go to) which caused 14km of traffic, and bam an opportunity gone!

but i find the best way to fight it, is i guess go out and really just soak in how beautiful this world is (walking the dog/alone time etc) really gets your mind off things, but yeah hopefully i see the light at the end of the tunnel soon, right now don't feel so good :/

I know how you feel bro, I've quit uni plus stopped listening to my old man (he is the reason for all this) and started doing what I want now that if my old man has an issue I can drop him.

We don't have a good relationship with my old man but he started it and couldn't handle us growing up into what we wanted not what he wanted. We had it hard growing up as kids being isolated from social shit because my dad thought it was stupid or anything that wasn't high education based, he thought us studying all the time and only that was the most important thing he also thought we had time to have fun once we were in our 30s...

He has held me and my brother back in life (things like denying us our license when we were 16, not letting us get jobs young or do things outside like hobbies and etc) just so he looks good infront of his mates (my sons are good at school and etc like this matters anymore, I don't give 2 ****s if someone went to uni or not but he does so much).

Me and my bro are losing the race in life in our age group and it's hard to take it in. He is delusional, still thinks like this and is a bad liar (he has made so many promises to me and my bro for achieving things he never comes good on or just ignores), one time he though the largest potato farmer in Australia wasn't worth 5 cents because he wasn't uni educated... that's how delusional he is and my poor mum just follows him like a brainwashed idiot.

I fell into a slump of feeling trapped and not able to achieve for myself during uni and but one day I snapped and broke through once I stood up to my dad and told him I'm not scarred to put you in your place try me he just got scarred and stopped taking to us (similar thing happened to my bro). I know these are my patents but when they are ruining our future just too look good infront of their mates it was enough.

 

[Wolfmother]

Nano so glad you took control. The pressure of being under the whip would have been torturous.

 

[Wolfmother]

Yeah, my kids keep me going too. There is 2 major things I want to be around for, my boy making first grade with the Dogs and walking my daughter down the isle.

Awww that's sweet. I just fear for the kennel haters should they post anything negative.. haha.

 

[south of heaven]

Soh do you know what caused the anxiety? Did that help with your recovery?
Good on you for taking charge of the demons. it would've taken a massive leap to get where you are now.

No exactly sure what caused it . Still working on that one

 

[coach]

Holy shit mate, I guess we really don't understand what people go thru!!! Hats of to you for spilling ur guts to us, as I'm sure it will help other people!! You never know you might just of saved someone by sharing your experience!! Well done to you for not giving in but turning around and slapping it in the face!!!!!!

 

[south of heaven]

I think the worst thing is bottling it up.Wolf super markets are a very common place to have an attack .There are a few types of anxiety you have your gad ( general anxiety disorder ) which can effects you in public places .large crowds , super markets , train stations ect.
You have your post stress disorder which is triggered of by a tragic event.loss of life, accident ect.
Then there is health anxiety .where you think there is major health issues affecting you. Cancer , tumors, heart attacks ect.
There are many sights to do research on you would be very surprised how many symptoms there can be. Some people may suffer mildly , some are severe. But the quicker it gets addressed the quicker you can work on it

 

[Raysie]

One thing worse than having anxiety/depression and actually knowing about it, is having it and not understanding it.

It was an extremely scary time at first for me because I didn't know what was going on or how to handle it - especially only being 16 when this started happening. The panic attacks are multiplied by x100 at first due to this as mentally you just don't know how to handle what is an extremely scary situation.

The first step is knowing you've got the issue so you can learn to ride/fight it on that fateful day it decides to show it's ugly head.

 

[south of heaven]

Another thing that concerns me is medication. Now medication can help people with but they are not a miracle cure , you have to do work yourself to fight it.some people DO NEED MEDICATION to help it's something that you and your doctor have to discuss .Some doctors will write anything up.some will actually .try to see there is a solution with out them.
I found a doctor that wanted me on meds but was willing to try some natural options first. One suggestion I was given was yoga. My first reaction was fukk that I ain't no hippie, but what have I got to loose so I forced my self to go .When I got there I was so fukking nervous hiding in the back corner. Then I was asked to introduce myself aghhhhhhhhhh. Lol
I kept at it after about 8 weeks I was getting some clarity. Even a walk on the beach with your self can really help.

 

[CroydonDog]

Medication will be a godsend to some, but long term planning and lifestyle adjustments are probably more ideal.

Tbh, for me antidepressants have only one real side affect - lowering of libido. Mrs CroydonDog and I are both 37 and so we know our time to procreate is narrowing. I have made the decision to come off the drugs (but slowly). But I know other things like being open with loved ones, exercise, cutting back on the grog etc will also help.

All the best to those who are suffering.

 

[Papa Emeritus]

Nice to hear people talking about their demons openly.
I have had my issues but nothing compared to the stuff here ;/

Stay strong kennellers.

 

[Moe]

I'm not going to share any of my own experiences, but I will say that the older I have gotten the more I realise how prevalent depression is amongst men.

When I was a teen I used to think that depression was just an excuse that guys (mainly footy players) used to justify their actions or to seek attention. But as you grow older you realise how real it is.

 

[Mr Beast]

so many feels in this thread hope everyone pulls through there troubles.

life isn't easy.

good quote I've heard

"god gives the hardest battles to the strongest soliders" i kinda live by that now. i think everyone is capable of pulling through with the right guidance and help, but also willingness to adapt to accept and change.

thats my 2 cents

i myself have been going through shit but ill just leave it at that, only just late last year a pretty 33 yo girl (friend) took her only life. pretty sad and unexpected.

i like everyone here on the kennel. everyone has their own personality.

<3

 

[Hacky McAxe]

Excellent thread.

I've never been diagnosed with clinical depression, never been that bad, but I have suffered from depression. I never had difficulty getting out of bed from it but I will often have this impending sense of doom for no reason. It literally feels like the world is about to end and you're about to burn in hell. That will be coupled more with my mind going crazy. Once it starts I think to myself that I can't do anything to get myself out of the pit.

It feels like you're falling down deeper and you just can't climb up no matter what you do and you have no idea why you're falling.

Fortunately for me it eventually passes. I also found that it's easier when I don't just keep it to myself. Just talking about my life with others, the good things, the bad things, just everything that I'm feeling, that always helps a little.

It's different for many people though. I know a lot of people exercise or eat healthy to fight depression. Getting more sleep generally helps. Talking or just finding a hobby that you love can help too.

But this is dealing with common depression, not clinical depression.

 

[Wolfmother]

I think the worst thing is bottling it up.Wolf super markets are a very common place to have an attack .There are a few types of anxiety you have your gad ( general anxiety disorder ) which can effects you in public places .large crowds , super markets , train stations ect.
You have your post stress disorder which is triggered of by a tragic event.loss of life, accident ect.
Then there is health anxiety .where you think there is major health issues affecting you. Cancer , tumors, heart attacks ect.
There are many sights to do research on you would be very surprised how many symptoms there can be. Some people may suffer mildly , some are severe. But the quicker it gets addressed the quicker you can work on it

Thanks Southy I really appreciate all of the info . I find my attacks are exacerbated when I'm tired , you mentioned yoga worked for you so I might read up about that as well .
I actually did see my doctor and told him of my symptoms and he just said 'what are you worried about , got me to do a thyroid test and then changed the dosage .

 

[Moe]

It's different for many people though. I know a lot of people exercise or eat healthy to fight depression. Getting more sleep generally helps. Talking or just finding a hobby that you love can help too.

Honestly going to the gym and trying to stay healthy helps big time. They say "Healthy body, healthy mind" it's so true.

That and Trance music get's me through the tough days <3

 

[Ecca]

I love this thread guys, I hope people keep contributing to it.

Me personally, I have gone through my bouts of depression, drinking, drugs etc. It has gotten quite serious at times.

Stress is the big killer I find. Sometimes the pressure of everything just weighs on you.

I love reading this thread. Light in the darkness is always refreshing.

Keep it up everyone

 

[CroydonDog]

Stress is the big killer I find. Sometimes the pressure of everything just weighs on you.

BANG ON!

My last bout of depression (2nd serous time in my life - first was after my ex-wife miscarried after several IVF attempts and our marriage was crumbling) occurred late last year, and it seemed to be triggered by the pressures of moving to a new city, a bad break up (she was a dead set psycho) and working for a complete ar#ehole with the EQ of a potato. It felt like nothing was going right, and one morning i found myself unable to get out of bed.

Luckily for me, I had just started dating the most amazing women, who somehow stuck by my side, encouraging me to quit my job before I had a serious breakdown. My dad is severely old school. We never hug or talk about our feelings or any of that lot. Even he said "son, you've never asked us for help, and we will will be there every step of the way". They paid my mortgage for 3 months whilst I took counselling and struggled with what to do with myself, and my father even drove 1400km by himself to come up and just hang out, and with my girlfriend overseas for work for a month, just having my Dad play golf with me, share a beer and watch footy, in a city where i didn't know many others,was a godsend. We are probably now closer than ever. I have now learned the importance of trying to surround yourself with positive people.

I also, perhaps fool-heartedly decided, in a "now or never" moment, to start my own practice It's a different kind of stress, but i feel so much more in control of my destiny.

Finally, there is the dog. They are funny creatures, who seem to have a sixth sense. In my darkest moments, mine will come and sit at my feet, look at me and say "i've got your back, human". lol.

 

[The DoggFather]

so many feels in this thread hope everyone pulls through there troubles.

life isn't easy.

good quote I've heard

"god gives the hardest battles to the strongest soliders" i kinda live by that now. i think everyone is capable of pulling through with the right guidance and help, but also willingness to adapt to accept and change.

thats my 2 cents

i myself have been going through shit but ill just leave it at that, only just late last year a pretty 33 yo girl (friend) took her only life. pretty sad and unexpected.

i like everyone here on the kennel. everyone has their own personality.

<3

F*** I must be a real strong c*** then lol

Seriously, I like that saying.

 

[Hacky McAxe]

Here's a good guide of Symptoms of depression. Keep in mind that having these Symptoms doesn't automatically mean you are depressed but it could be something to watch out for:

Signs and symptoms of depression include:

Feelings of helplessness and hopelessness. A bleak outlook—nothing will ever get better and there’s nothing you can do to improve your situation.

Loss of interest in daily activities. No interest in former hobbies, pastimes, social activities, or sex. You’ve lost your ability to feel joy and pleasure.

Appetite or weight changes. Significant weight loss or weight gain—a change of more than 5% of body weight in a month.

Sleep changes. Either insomnia, especially waking in the early hours of the morning, or oversleeping (also known as hypersomnia).

Anger or irritability. Feeling agitated, restless, or even violent. Your tolerance level is low, your temper short, and everything and everyone gets on your nerves.

Loss of energy. Feeling fatigued, sluggish, and physically drained. Your whole body may feel heavy, and even small tasks are exhausting or take longer to complete.

Self-loathing. Strong feelings of worthlessness or guilt. You harshly criticize yourself for perceived faults and mistakes.

Reckless behaviour. You engage in escapist behaviour such as substance abuse, compulsive gambling, reckless driving, or dangerous sports.

Concentration problems. Trouble focusing, making decisions, or remembering things.

Unexplained aches and pains. An increase in physical complaints such as headaches, back pain, aching muscles, and stomach pain.

http://www.helpguide.org/mental/depression_signs_types_diagnosis_treatment.htm