Ok I'll quote.
- Groundskeeper Willie
It won't last. Brothers and sisters are natural enemies. Like Englishmen and Scots! Or Welshmen and Scots! Or Japanese and Scots! Or Scots and other Scots! Damn Scots! They ruined Scotland!
- Mr Burns
Smither: "Sir the people kind of see you as an ogre..."
Mr Burns: "I ought to club them and eat their bones!"
- Chief Wiggum
This is Wiggum reporting a 3-18: Waking a police officer.
- Disco Stu
Disco Stu is going to win some dough playing tic-tac-toe.
- Moe
Moe: Just a sec. Hey, is there a Butts here? A Seymour Butts? Hey, everybody, I wanna Seymour Butts! Wait a minute... Listen, you little scum-sucking pus-bucket! When I get my hands on you, I'm gonna pull out your eyeballs with a corkscrew!
- Lenny
Dental plan.
- Prof. Frink
- Ned Flanders
Hey Homie, I can see your doodle.
- Nelson Muntz
- Fat Tony
Dan: Fat Tony, a word?
Fat Tony: How about meringue?
Dan: That's a great word.
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Fat Tony: Pick a horse, kid. We're putting two dollars on the third race. Make it a good one.
Bart: Eat my shorts!
Fat Tony: Eat My Shorts? Okay, let's see ... wait a minute, you little punk! Eat My Shorts is in the fifth race! I said the third race!
Bart: Don't have a cow.
Fat Tony: Hmm, Don't Have A Cow in the third, put a deuce on him.
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Fat Tony: Call that doctor that owes us a favor.
Louise: Actually we owe him a favor
Fat Tony: Do him two favors and then remind him that he owes us a favor.
