Poem competition

Mr Invisible

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So many posts and not one referring to a man from Nantucket.

Disappointed
There was once a young man from Nantucket.
It's too late, can't be bothered. SO FUCK IT...
I just don't have the time, to complete this quick rhyme.
So somebody else can conduct it.
 

Alan79

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An ode to a dog lover


There was a young man from Nantucket
Who carried a dog in his bucket.
He partied with Pearce
Who said "who's dog is thiisss"
Then made a big mess on the carpet

I have an alternate ending equally as happy for Pearce.

Then grabbed it and ran off to fuck it.


There once was a boy from penwiff
He had a real bad case of dandruff
The cure showed by Carney
Was quite fucking barmy
And led to poor Todd Carneys sendoff.

I might do some more tomorrow if I get bored.
 

ILiveForDib

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Differences between nigers

Sg nice guy= Superfade nice guy
NG nice guy= nice guy nice guy aka the king
OG nice guy= Obsidian original gangster nice guy

I'm an OG niggger. Don't ask!
 

ILiveForDib

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Cum dumpster

I was walking down the street
Had an urge to skeet
Saw a dirty dumpster
this looks nicer than the girl I dumped'r

I unzipped my pants
shat on the plants
got nice and hard
and shot off harder than a pornstar.
(FUCK THAT DIDN'T RHYME)

I have too much time
because all I do is shoot slime
all over the back
of a president who is black.

I like sluts
I bang sluts
I make them cum
faster than a game of putt putt.
(DAMMIT I CANT FUCKING RHYME)

All of you poetry snobs
are more stupid than calvin and hobbes
You will never be as successful as
Steve Jobs.
 

Flanagun

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Ah yes I heard Steve Jobs made his first million from reading his poems in coffee houses.

One person's trash is another one's treasure,
Lower your standards and double your pleasure!
 

Alan79

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There was a man named Hopoate
He was popular at some types of party.
Where the guests were all men
Who'd squeal "tackle me again"
And the air seemed to smell kind of fart-ey
 

Mr 95%

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There once was a Doggies fan named @Wolfmother
Who wished that Ennis was her lover.
She looked at him
With a seductive grin,
But than remembered she was married to another!

:grinning:
 
Last edited:

The DoggFather

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There once was a Doggies fan named @Wolfmother
Who wished that Ennis was her lover.
She looked at him
With a seductive grin,
But than remembered she was married to another!

:grinning:
There once was a Doggies fan named Zee,
Who wished that Ennis was his lover.
He looked at him
With a seductive grin,
But than remembered he was married to another!

Lol ok it doesn't rhyme but still works lol
 

Indiandog

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There once was a Doggies fan named Zee,
Who wished that Ennis was his lover.
He looked at him
With a seductive grin,
But than remembered he was married to another!

Lol ok it doesn't rhyme but still works lol
LOL, top effort champ!
 

Mr Invisible

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Roses are Red,
Violets are Blue,
Whilst in the rose garden,
I stepped in dog poo.

Roses are Red,
Violets are Blue,
I love saving money,
So must be a Jew!
 

Wahesh

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I am sorry for the bump, but snot just came out of my nose reading this thread again, and I'm dying with laughter. I CANNOT let this thread be locked and hit the archives :D

:tearsofjoy::tearsofjoy::tearsofjoy:
 

Flanagun

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Up high in the sky
Confecting outrage with my
Telephoto lens

Haiku, mutherfuckers!
 

The_Chimpster

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From the toilet cubicle came buzz rothfield who was looking for some booze, he scrounged around for hours banged his head and ended up with a bruise. In a single moment he found the love of his life, metho and petrol were the solutions to his never ending plight
 

Wahesh

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Kissing is a habit
****ing is a game
Guys get all the pleasure
Girls get all the pain
The guy says i love you
You believe its true
But when your tummy starts to swell,
He says 'to hell with you'
10 minutes of pleasure
9 months in pain
3 days in hospital
A child without a name
The baby is innocent
The mother is a wh*re
This never would've have happened
If the rubber never torn
 
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Mr Invisible

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Ode to Phil Rothfield
Roses are red,
Violets are blue.
Just like the lingerie
On the waitress on you.

Roses are red,
But wiltered and dead
Just like buzz rothfield
And his dick for a head.
 

The DoggFather

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I mix a whiskey drink
I mix a vodka drink
And when I have to pee
I use the kitchen sink

- Homer
 
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