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Gather around the campfire kiddies - Uncle CK has a story to tell. I wanna take you back to March 2009 and how blind faith changed my life forever. You see, back then, Bulldogs were emerging from the ashes of a smoldering shitheap of a year. Uncle Todd Greenberg had control of the ship and we'd...

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">It is GAME DAY!!! <a href="https://twitter.com/hashtag/redv?src=hash&amp;ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">#redv</a> <a href="https://twitter.com/hashtag/NRLbulldogsdragons?src=hash&amp;ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">#NRLbulldogsdragons</a> <a...

Tipsters, punters, Super-coaches unite !!! Give us your best forecasts below ... • Which teams will push for Top 4 ? Roosters, Storm, Souths. • Which teams will be likely Bottom 4 contenders ? Gold Coast, Bulldogs. • Who's in danger to fall out of the Top 8 ? Cronulla, St.George. • Who's gonna...

Kennel ... Tell me about your daily diet and what sliced bread you eat. I dunno if it's the new year resolutions kicking in, or if my wife is having one of her periodic life changing brainstorms but, this week, it seems that we're overhauling our approach to our diets and in particular we're...

I've just realised that this game is on. I'm telling ya ... we ALWAYS take over Campbelltown when we play there. We play NZ in NZ Rd1. We play Parra at ANZ Rd2. Then we play THIS in Rd3, on a Sunday at 4pm. By my count, we've got 75 days until March 31st to get our shit together. This game...

Apart from the obvious things like pools and air conditioning, have you got a little trick you like to help keep cool ? Here's what we do in Casa De La CeeKay when we cant go to beaches, shops, etc ... - Windows open overnight (Doors open optional) : Lets the trapped heat escape. - Close North...

(TL;DR version = Bad times came. Got mad. Gave up. Random awakening led to best year as a fan I've ever had .... Thanks for playing - Use this in your Quote instead of a whole 5000 word post) I hear you. I feel you. I get it, I really do. Allow me to rewind the clock to the dark, dark times...

Y'all know the drill ... Win 12 games and we go to the finals. Be under NO illusions folks ! Gonna be a tough slog this year. Have you seen this fucking atrocious draw we got ? I'm just hoping we get to end-of-Origin with a 50-50 record and make charge. How many games do you see us winning ...

So here's the deal. With the passage of time, I now find myself with three kids aged between 11 and 5. The eldest girl (we call her Bozo) is in Year 6, turns 12 in April, and we have to make decision on her high school options ... well, pretty much NOW ! Me and the wife are pretty tight. We've...

Nice to be back in the old stomping ground. Love what you've done with the place. Are the toilets still up the hall on the left ? Long story short : Family, kids, health, work, punting, YouTube, Twitter (and of course the last two years of clusterfuck around the club) have all conspired to...

We all agree life in 2017 is largely digital, and while we love the convenience, etc, etc, etc ... with it comes the problem of password, logins, usernames, security questions, two-factor authentication, fingerprint ID, software updates and cloud storage. I'm at a point now where if I don't...

Good evening Ye Olde Kennel-folk ... :) It's been far too long between rants. Yesterday, somebody dropped by my Twitter account and activated my 'Batman light' with a quiet "Haven't seen your posts in a while". Accordingly, my huge ego has seized it as a call to arms. Times are difficult and my...

A couple of suggestions if I may ... I know we're in the back end of the year, so pencil them into the back of your mind for next season. (1) Regular schedule : I see you sometimes on Twitter, but not regularly. I'd like to draw more attention to the site for you, but can never seem to 'catch...

Howdy Kennel-Sirs and Kennel-ettes, Long time no rant eh? The TL;DR version of me is, I'm much busier with life these days but I do lurk a lot without posting (I like to 'soak in' threads, but I find that harder these days so I just observe). Anyhoo, that's not why I'm here. We can catch up...

Welcome to the first edition of what I hope will be a regular feature I like to call "Settle This !" Anytime you, your mates, your better-half, other Kennelers, or staff you work with, have a beef ... you can bring it in here and have The Kennel "Settle This" ! Me and the missus just had a...

Tenure : 2012 - ongoing (4 seasons) Premierships : 0/4 Runner-up : 2/4 Finals appearances : 4/4 Finals record : 6-4 (incl 2x GF losses) Highest reg. season finish : 1st (18-6 : Made the '12 GF) Lowest reg. season finish : 7th (13-11 : Made the '14 GF) Average reg season : 5th Average reg...

Punters and betting tragics unite !!! I need your help. I've been modelling some betting data in spreadsheets, and have stumbled across something my brain will no longer compute. Run with me here ... Golden Rule #1 = Never bet more than 5% of your balance : For the purposes of this chat I'm...

So I've had a brief detox and now that I'm back, er'body is all flapping their wings and beating their chests ... I can't tell what's real. Can I get a bullet-point run-down of events ?

BOOTS !!! You receding perm havin', gorgeous family havin' sunufabitch !!! Facebook says we should be wishing you Happy Birthday. Nice try hiding it you sly dawg.

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Run with me here ... We all agree Australia is the best place to live. But if we're honest, we're also pretty shithouse at certain aspects of being a functioning society. When it comes to the following, we're pretty good. Gun Reform : Back in the 90's Johnny Howard took the plunge and said...

Lately I've been discussing with the wife we should get some bright yellow cushions to go with the lounge, which is grey. Today at work the ridiculously-attractive-Indian-girl-with-epic-boobs is in, and she is wearing a yellow top with grey cardigan. Is there any way I can ask for a photo...

Here's an idea for y'all to ridicule to shreds ... Our club should get 2-3 fans in every home game, sit 'em in a box (or simply sit next to them in the crowd and mic them up) and record their game-day commentary. Then, overdub/edit it into match footage. Then post it up on the website. Who...

Disclaimer : I am an eternal optimist and dislike much of the negativity here. That's no secret. But considering it's off-season, and I'm bored, Imma start this chat because I'm actually interested a gathering a variety of opinions, to help me better understand the source of negativity here...

Ever found yourself looking at videos on YouTube about a particular subject and nek minnit "Oops, 3 hours have passed !" ??? Was watching a whole bunch of public transport fights the other day. Today, I encountered "squeezing zits", but I'm not going anywhere near it because I wont leave...

El Jannah @ Granville caught on fire tonight. :(

... Good job ! :) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XB7xlGvcIyQ&sns=em

Why aren't we talking about the pig-f*cker ??? Confess your animal attractions in this thread.

Disclaimer : I am NOT a member. Never have been. Consider it every year, but in the end logistics and stinginess wins and I usually wind up getting to a game or two at best. Now that you've all had a night to sleep on it ... Cast your vote. Q: Has the events of last night resulted in you...

JESUS AITCH CHRIST !!! .... Look at this mess !!! It's gonna take ages to clean this place up. Someone get a broom and start sweeping. I'll get started on the glassware and dishes. While you're all recovering from footy hangovers, sit here for a minute, gather your thoughts, and tell us...

One of the greatest joys being a Bulldogs fan gives me, is the way we embrace each others happiness. If there's a story on a fan doing it tough and they get some luck, we're all over it congratulating them on their success. If some fans drive 1000's of kms to watch a game, we're on it to...

Invariably, when someone is interviewed in NRL circles your ears might pay extra attention if you like what they say. So this thread is a chance to talk about some of the great rugby league minds in the game. People who you could listen to for hours. People who make you go away having learned...

If you believe the naysayers and dooms-dayers, we should probably forfeit next week. Kasiano, Pritchard and Eastwood should all be up on attempted murder charges. We sold our 200 game hooker for a 50 game hooker, and now he's injured we gotta rest our sizable hopes on the shoulders of our...

Hear YE ! Hear YE ! Banana M&M's are a must have for thy pantry. Once more into the breach of supermarkets dear friends, and acquire thee a packet before they are ravaged by the great unwashed !!!

When was the last time we racked up 50+ points ? Was it that time we beat Roosters and Marty Kennedy gave us a lifetime of lulz ??? When was the last time we kept someone scoreless ? We've been close in recent years but surely we're overdue. Can we do both ? What's more important ???

To bring some of y'all up to speed, I got one boy who's seven. He's the middle child and for purposes of this thread we'll call him PorkChop. 2015 was the year he "got" footy. Understands the scores, how much a try/goal is worth, how much time is left. Invents nicknames on the fly for...

Alright coaches ... One round to go in 2015. Locked in for finals. Time to get our chess brains on and think 4 moves ahead. We need ideas. We need set-plays. We need performance goals for the squad. Consider the following, and come up with a plan to win the comp. - Lichaa AND...

What's been the hardest farewell you've ever had to deal with ? - Pricey hurt a lot. - Shrek, Nate, Mace all pissed me off. - David Stagg disappointed me. - So did Dene Halatau. - Kane Cleal I felt bad for. - Krisnan Inu was awesome to have around. - Mick Ennis was a fave. - Joel...

I wholly endorse this initiative, and I've been saying for years we should make the last home game 'fancy dress and/or costume party' for fans. Well done to these two last night ... my whole house erupted with laughter especially my 7yo boy.

Hearing reports emerge online that Wests Tigers Matthew Lodge was arrested with multiple DV charges. Post info as you find it ... PS : Seriously fellas, as a society what do we do about this ? Have you had to intervene on anyone you know and call them out on it ? What can we do to teach...

Call it instinct. Call it gut-feeling. Call me kooky, call me whacky. I honestly believe we'll have the goods to win tonight. - Our forwards > Their forwards - Our halves > Their halves - Our bench > Their bench - Hoko will lead us around and heard the boys like a sheep farmer does...

As if I don't have enough to deal with, two days ago my lower back seized up (because apparently reaching for my dog's collar while he's sitting between my legs is too much of an ask these days). Can't work, drive, walk or even shit without getting grabbing lumbar pains ... doped up on Endone...

Brent Read on Triple M just reported Warriors are in deep poop with the salary cap situation and are looking to offload players. Can one of you smarty pants types make a shopping list ? Is Konrad Hurrell worth a look ?

I'm not sure if I've forgiven Sam Perrett yet. Which brings me to this thread. What's the angriest moment you recall from watching footy ? For me ... - Jamie Soward / Video-ref @ Kogarah - Inglis Origin try off the foot. - 2006 SF loss to Broncos. Sam went close to making top three...

Help me out here folks. I'm trying to get my head around all the different fan 'types' Think of your average Bulldogs fan. Someone you know. What makes them 'typical' ? What traits make them identifiable ? A few that come to mind include ... - The 'stats' guy : Knows the history...

2nd - Roosters = 36pts (+225) : Knights (A), Parra (H), Brisbane (H), Manly (A), Souths (H) 1st - Brisbane = 38pts (+202) : Bulldogs (H), St George (H), Roosters (A), Souths (A). Melbourne (H) 3rd - Cowboys = 36pts (+111) : Cronulla (A), Souths (H), Warriors (A), Melbourne (A), Gold Coast (H)...

If someone wrote a book on former Bulldogs players and the urban legends their famous for, I'd buy one for me and all my family members. Chapter One : Shrek. His days tackling punching bags hanging from a tree in Wyong. His Dencorub. Chapter Two : The Fred Briggs story - From labourer one...

I just ate a whole packet of Mint Slice biscuits. Same thing happens whenever Ferrero Rocher's are in the same room. Can someone stage an intervention for me ?

Alright folks, time to get your Dessie on. Going into any game, the team will approach certain areas as non-negotiable. Depending on ladder position and squad strength, certain criteria are more important than others. What KPI's demonstrate to you our boys are playing well ? Give us your Top...

Complete the sentence : "I would smash you all at _______ ?" Wanna see what you're good at and if anyone here has hidden talents we can profit from. FYI, I would smash you all at indoor cricket (played for NSW in 2004) and ten-pin bowling (highest score 189).

This ... is a "She-Shed". A man-cave for ladies ! Is nothing sacred anymore ?!?!?!?

I've got a buddy at work. His name is Glen. He's the perfect example of what our club does to opposition fans on a weekly basis. Glen is rusted-on Parra fan. A real Hindmarsh tragic. Must've been following them as long as I have the Bulldogs. Now, of course, next week we face Parra, and I'm...

As it stands, the Byes are over and we've got 8 games left to cement a finals spot. Only a Cronulla win over Dragons by 30pts would dislodge us from 8th. 1st = Brisbane 30pts (+115) 2nd = Cowboys 26pts (+34) 3rd = Roosters 24pts (+138) 4th = Warriors 22pts (+27) 5th = Souths 22pts (+18) 6th =...

This is staggering to me ... Gus Gould just posted this on Twitter, and a quick look at the "Time In Possession" stats reveal QLD had the ball for 30:41, while NSW had it for 15:09. Add that together, we've got roughly 45mins of an 80min game where the ball is actually in play. 56% of...

It feels soooooo good to be universally applauded by the NRL community. - Media everywhere loved it. - The ground looked in brilliant nick. - The ocean of blue'n'white on TV was mesmerising. - The crowd chants could be heard from the next suburb. - Radio on MMM couldn't stop waxing...

The million dollar question on everybody's lips ... Where will the Bulldogs Army station itself ? - On the hill - Western End (ie: train track end) - Eastern End Representatives attending should assemble here in this thread and discuss your plans. - Who's bringing flags ? - Who's...

Follow this on Twitter for ongoing chat, bad-humour and on-the-scene reports : https://twitter.com/hashtag/dallaspdshooting?src=hash&vertical=default&f=tweets To bring you up to speed ... - Suspect is white, and armed with automatic weapons including explosives. - Driving an armoured van that...

I smell a streak coming. Rd12 : Canberra (A) = Win by 7 Rd13 : Dragons (H) = Win by 13 Rd14 : Gold Coast (A) = [ Origin depleted / Low on confidence ... we'll smoke 'em] Rd15 : Penrith (H) = [ Injury riddled / Low on confidence ... we'll smoke them too] Rd16 : Melbourne (@Belmore) = [...

Anyone having a geez at a shirtless James Graham during today's match wish to comment on what a sight to behold it was ? Some observations if I may ... - His abs are huge and his jersey looks like it needs a bonnet scoop. Either that or he's eaten half a cows arse prior to the game and...

State of Origin: NSW v Queensland clash broken down by American NFL writer Cam Inman FOX SPORTS May 28, 2015 9:00AM Source = http://www.foxsports.com.au/nrl/state-of-origin-nsw-v-queensland-clash-broken-down-by-american-nfl-writer/story-e6frf3ou-1227372369975 SANTA CLARA -...

- Mick Ennis - Ryan Heathcote. - Michael Leeches. - Geordie Peats's lad. - Mister Rein. - The Souths GF hooker who went to Penrith. - Grub Reynolds. - Old man Gids. Who else is there ?

I know we're not even half way through the season, but I've already started hearing chat that sounds like "if results go our way this week". So it got me thinking : At the mid-stages of a season, if you could have results go our way, does that mean we'd (a) prefer teams close to us on the...

There's a distinct lack of KE quiz's on this forum. I shant allow it to go on any further. (1) I can't be friends with anyone who has never seen "_________ ? (2) A night a the movies isn't complete without buying "_______" to eat/drink ? (3) If you had to chose, for $1million would you...

Hayfever : How good is it ? .... I don't know about you, but sneezing seven times a minute and them walking around with one red eyeball for the next hour is mad fun. Especially when I'm driving in double lanes of traffic on Woodville Road. Nothing like a near death experience on your commute to...

I've been wondering for ages, but I still can't figure out the appeal. What makes ute drivers "pimp" their utes to look like mini-trucks? We've all seen 'em on the roads ... - V8 - Sports kit and rims - Truck sized bull-bar on front - 6+ spotlights that could bake a chook at close range. - 4+...

The more I give this thought, the more plausible it seems. Hazem El Masri : 2418 points - 159 tries & 891 goals / 14 seasons & 317 games Cameron Smith : 1721 points - 38 tries & 784 goals / 13 seasons & 294 games Jonathan Thurston : 1663 points - 81 tries & 664 goals / 13 seasons & 253...

I'm no more of an authority on this issue than the next punter, but for those of you on here who are new to "betting" or are influenced by chatter surrounding "favoritism", I'm gonna try and explain a basic understanding of "markets". Say we're playing Canberra ... there's three trains of...

Hello friends and fans alike, As the saying goes "everything comes full circle". In the era of Des, we've enjoyed winning multiple games in succession and when required we've learned to "grind out a win". With the honeymoon of 2012 over, in recent seasons we've seen shorter win streaks, a...

That's it !!! We've had enough ... - Sack Des : He can't coach - Sack Raelene : She can't CEO - Sack Hodkinson : He can't play like Andrew Johns every week. - Sack Graham : He's a nutcase and/or too many suspensions and/or he's a liability. - Sack Reynolds : He's a nutcase and/or too...

I just realised something. Greg Bird is at the judiciary tonight. If he gets done, he's out for yonks, enter NSW conspiracy nuts. If he gets a lighten deal, enter QLD conspiracy nuts. Discuss with "Pffft, meh."

My 7yo boy unwittingly made this when fiddling with it's arms, and we now call him Rodzilla ...

I changed your avatar. Don't do it again. :thumb:

I'm pretty excited to watch these. I'd love to see this expanded to include others in the near future like Japan, USA, Canada, etc Saturday 2nd May : FoxSports 1 5.45pm = PNG vs Fiji 7.40pm = Samoa vs Tonga Fiji Line-Up 1 Kevin Naiqama 2 Marika Koroibete 3 Fabian Goodall 4...

Only 15 seconds long ... :thumb: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DeII2eGcvRs

Images are being circulated by NSW Police and major media in an attempt to round up those responsible for throwing bottles at the Souths game. Call Crime stoppers on 1800 333 000 if you can assist ...

There's three reasons why I got behind the Joel Romelo bandwagon when he was with us. 1. I saw him play. On my birthday. For Penrith U20's. He scored 3 tries and smashed two of our players into a stint in the dressing sheds. 2. I made an idiotic thread the next day saying we should sign...

*** Bring back Joel Romelo !!! *** - Can kick long - Can grubber - Can run from dummy-half - Can smash c*nts ! - Can upset a star-players rhythm. - At his asking rate, you could buy 5 Joel's for the price of 1 other semi-functional half we currently got. Get him back. PRONTO !!!

Some genius has created a site where you can customise you very own sensationalist headlines. http://thesauce.co/telegraph_generator/ In the click of a few buttons you too can obtain many of the pre-requisites necessary for a burgeoning career in Australia's biggest monument to capitalist...

Here's the thing : At AFL games in recent years, if a racist yells out something objectionable, they're identified within a couple of days and memberships revoked and/or bans issued. The fans have decided enough is enough, and see to it that the person who brought disrepute to their club is...

Denial = "This can't be happening !" Anger = "We got f*cking rorted. F*ck those prix in NRL !!! I'm never going to a game again !!!" Bargaining = "We should mount a social media campaign using evidence X,Y & Z so we can get off !" Depression = "It sucks we're gonna be missing out player...

As y6ou can t5ell, Im get5t5ing bonus charact5ers when i t5y6e .... What5 t5he hell do I do. heres my6 alhabet5 abcdefghijklmnoqqerwirst5uvwxy6z Halp?

All this talk about Netflix today so I figured I'd get an education on it from some of our esteemed posters ... Help a brother out ! 1. What is Netflix, and what does it do ? 2. Why should I get it ? 3. What 'cons' are there with getting Netflix ?

Honestly people ... some of y'all are gonna have an aneurysm. - It's 3 rounds into the season - There's still 91% of it remaining. - We're in the Top Four. - We have the Origin winning halves combination - We were runners up last year from 7th. - We signed Brett f*cking Morris ! - James...

What's this who-hahhh about Ben Roberts returning ? If true : What's this sorcery ??!!?

Turns out budget cuts and flagging readership have done wonders for the editorial standards at The Daily Telecrap, and the sub-editors these days are either asleep at the wheel, not trying, drunk, or all of the above. Twitter is ablaze with criticism over this little thing appearing in a...

Ex-NRL star Carl Webb arrested in Cairns Source =...

Here's what happened. I decide I gotta go the ATM at the servo. Kids banking tomorrow. Need some cash for a visit to Jaycar in the morning. Off I go, and I'm 2 mins into the drive and I get a call from the wife that went like this ... Me: Hello ! Wife: Are you there yet? Me: Almost...

So it's well established we have a healthy rivalry with Manly, and here we are in Rd3 and "Oh, Look !" ... See who appears on our schedule ... :) We get to play them, at their house, at a time when they are very depleted. - DCE is leaving - Foran is out injured - No Watmough or G.Stewart -...

So here's the background ... Mark Latham (former opposition leader and all-round abrasive know-it-all schooled in Western Sydney) was on Triple M last Tuesday arvo with Merrick and had some not too nice things to say about the TV show "Marathon Man" with Gus Worland's (North Shore raised and...

Did you sit in or near The Kennel tonight ? If so, love your work. :thumb: - The 'big heads' are awesome. - The big "Kennel" jersey is awesome. - Your flags and banners post-try are f*ckin' sexy. Stellar job tonight. Brings a tear to a veteran Bulldogs Army eye.

Surely I'm not alone is noticing the stark difference in treatment by the NRL towards these two clubs and their drug "saga". Loads of Sharkies fans are irate because they got left out in the cold to fend for themselves whereas Titans have been 'rescued' with millions being directed to ensure...

We've been here long enough to know how this plays out ... 6,413 rumours from 739 sources and weeks on end of facepalms and burst forehead veins. So let's start the discussion here. "Of the 4 mooted names, which halves should we secure long-term ?" Josh Reynolds. Trent Hodkinson. Daly...

While he was not part of the Manly squad for the Auckland 9's, Manly and NRL Integrity Unit are investigating a yet-to-be-clarified "anti-social incident in an "Auckland nightspot" (quote-unquote) over the weekend. Source ->...

2min time limit. First impressions. GO !!! 1. It's midnight. You've got munchies. What are we having ? 2. Time at the beach isn't complete without ..... ? 3. Fishing or Golf : Which sucks more and why ? 4. Taylor Swift is a worthy addition to the Hottest 100 should she make it in...

(*Note : Some players have been omitted. This is not an all-inclusive list.*) Point Scorers - All-time 10th : Cameron Smith = 1653 (02-14) 13th : Johnathan Thurston = 1586 (02-14) 23rd : Jamie Lyon = 1326 (00-14) 35th : Jamie Soward = 1158 (05-14) 48th : Michael Gordon = 1034 (06-14) 49th ...

Cut my skin and like you I bleed blue'n'white. But this year, more than any year in a long, long time ... I have zero worries. - We will be competitive. - We will have a squad of quality and versatile individuals. - We will make finals. In the era of Des, nothing is more assured than...

Seriously, this bloke is comedy gold. He's the face of Australian Defence League - Online trollers extraordinaire and general redneck outspoken commentators bleating about the destruction of white-Australia and the scourge of multiculturalism, etc, etc ... Not satisfied with being shouting...

It's generally during off-season I get all nostalgic and remember the crazy things that go on here. So here's what I wanna try and do ... Think of someone who did something on here so 'huge' it's left an everlasting memory you won't forget. Here's a few off the top of my head ... Slippery =...

Contrary to public optimism, I'm still alive. However my PC died just after the GF (don't worry Doga, data is safe :p) ... and now I gotta get used to posting from the mobile. Everything is wrong, and the early stages of my transformation towards Grandpa Simpson senility is progressing...

If ever a piece of prose were to sum up my true feelings on life and sport, it's this. If we don't cross paths before kick-off tomorrow, I wish you good luck, good times and everlasting glory. " If you think you are beaten, you are; If you think you dare not, you don't. If you'd like to...