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I am currently sitting on my throne and need a good game to play on my phone. Can anyone recommend and good free ones? I mostly like tower defence games but pretty much have them all. I also have a couple colour by number apps but they more of a relaxing thing than a "I'm bored" thing.

Any current DILFs (or MILFs for that matter) have any advice for future/new DILFs? What to expect, dos/don'ts, etc? Myself, @pillow and @bulldogsfan_88 are expecting/new dads. The missus is about to pop any day so now we play the waiting game. (the waiting game sucks, let's play hungry...

Ha! Got you! That player you don't like didn't re-sign and not only that, the player you like DIDN'T sign with us. Got you good!

Been hearing how amazing this sauce is so I thought I'd give it a go, honestly it's pretty damn good. Doesn't taste exactly like big Mac sauce but it's pretty close to it.

These feathered assholes have the entire sky to fly in but no fuck that, I'm going to walk on the road and make cars brake for me... And WTF is this flying inches from my windscreen when I'm driving? In my area we have several ponds about and you CONSTANTLY see cars randomly stopped in the...

Anyone else getting these fucking messages? I received fifteen of these all with different numbers. And to my work phone too, FFS. I don't even have fuckfacebook.

I take my phone into the can. I have my usual websites I browse when I'm in there (nothing sexual, because you don't shit where you eat). The missus says it's "disgusting" but I don't see anything wrong with it. I don't wipe with my phone, FFS. What say you? Is it "disgusting"?

Anyone else watching it on Stan? Man, that Bea Arthur was a pretty funny dude. He's very sarcastic in the show especially to the dumb one and the ganga.

For those who aren't getting the V or D...

What's up with that? Seems if there's a long and/or popular post there's an ad smack bang in the middle of it. Pretty annoying, TBH.

If you could go back to a point in your life, what year/age would you go back to and why? Condition is that you don't know the future. You only know what you knew then and have no benifit of knowing or controlling the future with the benifit of hindsight. I probably would stay as I am now but...

Pick any 3 celebrities you'd invite for dinner. Where would you have dinner and what would be served? I'd pick Dean Martin, Frank Sinatra and Don Rickles. Dinner would be at Frank's house and we'd have steak (ribeye medium rare) with all the trimmings like cool cats of the '50's. What about...

These ads seem to have it in for me. Premature, um, arriving and now this...

Anyone else into aviation? Surely it's not just @south of heaven and I who are sexually attracted to planes?

Welcome to the 2018 Kennies. Please cast your votes to obtain a shiny, non existent plastic trophy which will entitle you to talk down to everyone. If you win the imaginary award please be sure to use your speech for political purposes. I want to hear how a rainforest in South West Zimbabwe can...

I know it's pretty similar to that guy who swears a lot's thread but what's your favourite Christmas Movie? Mine, without a doubt, is Home Alone 2. That movie started my love affair with New York and has a great soundtrack.

Ambrosia v horseshit, delicate, flaky amazingness v dry, cardboard circles. which do you prefer? One can be eaten by the truck load simply on its own and the other causes dehydration.

What's the worst holiday/destination you've ever had? Mine has to be San Francisco without a doubt. Been once in 2008 and hated it. I liked Alcatraz but between the streets literally lined with homeless people and/or junkies and the shit weather, I'd never go back. LA is also shit. Nothing...

Yes, once but we hadn't had sex in about two weeks and I was very horny, didn't think I needed an ad for it....

Deserves its own thread. Just over a month until it comes out. I HATE what Rockstar has become but fuck me they know how to make a game. I still play GTA San Andreas. I don't usually pre order or buy special editions but I've bought this...

Does anyone actually reuse these bags? I have about 7,000 of them at home in the laundry. The missus has another 2,000 in her car. I saw a guy walk in with one in his hand the other day and thought "what a Greenberg".

Jack Daniels-Rotsfield and WhataDumb Kent A BULLDOGS supporter wearing a Cronulla Sharks jersey has been charged with terrorism offences after throwing what is believed to be a potentially unexploded stick of dynamite on the field during a gambling match last night. The incident occurred while...

So, apparently, according to Facebook there are 58 genders. Wtf? Agender Androgyne Androgynous Bigender Cis Cisgender Cis Female Cis Male Cis Man Cis Woman Cisgender Female Cisgender Male Cisgender Man Cisgender Woman Female to Male FTM Gender Fluid Gender Nonconforming Gender Questioning...

What's your opinion on it? I got a shit load of wine as gifts and I don't really drink it. Is it wrong to re gift them, is it ok? What do you guys think?

So, apparently the PC brigade have put down their cute little anti Trump signs and decided that the song "Baby, it's cold outside" is about/promotes rape. The perpetually outraged, socialist ***** have a problem with a classic song that's been around since the 60's...

So I got to work, parked the car, got out and found a blackberry mobile under my wiper (no joke). The phone works but has a password and I've tried the usual 0000, 1111, 1234 and have 3 attempts left. I'd like to return the phone to the owner as it clearly belongs to someone (wallpaper is a...

They have a 4 day sale where all games are heavily discounted. Example: games like watch dogs 2 (still debating whether to get it or not) and Battlefield 1 are $52 each. Titanfall 2 is $35. I don't have an actual link but www.bigw.com.au and www.target.com.au

One the scale of one to BJ, how awesome are scalp massages? I actually fall asleep to them.

Officially announced! http://m.au.ign.com/articles/2016/10/18/rockstars-new-game-is-red-dead-redemption-2-and-its-out-next-year

To all you monkey see, monkey do wannabe American ***** dressing up like clowns with knives trying to scare people, don't push your luck. All it takes is one person to panic and, rightfully, run you over or worse, kill you in self defence. And a reminder that in Australia, even a replica...

Thurston said that to the referee last night. I remember another player being crucified for pointing at the referee and countless players being suspended for touching the referee but because it's mother fucking Teresa, nothing is said or done. This isn't his first time swearing to/at the...

This game has caused me to have 3 hours sleep last night. For those of you that don't have it, get it. If you have a PS4, sell it and get a pc/xbox-one. The audio in this game is stunning. The Ferrari F12 TDF and the Aventador SV scream louder than pornstars. Anyway, off to play it for the...

Don't know if any of you guys watch it, if you don't you really need to. It's so dark, deep and depressing but it's one of the best written shows ever, IMO. Spoilers below. Diane getting an abortion. While I didn't really like the episode, how hilarious is brrap brrap pew pew...

I'm glad we won tonight so I can make this thread and not be accused of sour grapes. How many times did every single Canterbury player fuck every channel 9 employee? The coke head, fat slug and lol finch could not stop riding Caesar Milan's dick. Man of the match in a losing side? Fuck off...

That question, request, whatever you want to call it sums up nrl referees. We need to stop the game and double check to see if a player who was about 3 metres in the in goal got there by momentum. FMD....

It's so spot on. It's exactly how we speak.

"Campbelltown is such a nice area with a high employment rate. Not a bogan or junkie in sight" "man, that Indian guy smelt great" "I wish Wayne Bennett would whinge more" "nrl is such a great game. So consistent and entertaining" "I don't find Hollywood celebrities preachy at all"

Am I the only lazy f*ck that uses it ALL the time?

Why are they all either fat f*cks or skinny rodents and nothing in between? I'm looking at you, Campbelltown you fat f*cks.

You've been to? I've only ever been to Mexico and America. My favourite place in the world is New York, just an amazing, crazy busy city full of life and everything. Least Favourite was Miami. I'm not a clubbing person so I didn't like it that much. It's humid as F, the beaches are...

To all the people who aren't getting V or D.

I'm looking at getting a decent camera. Nothing shit but nothing over the top, price wise. Opinions on this camera, please. https://www.jbhifi.com.au/cameras/dslr/canon/canon-eos-1200dtkb-18mp-digital-slr-camera-twin-lens-kit/537356/ And which brand is the best? Canon, Nikon, Pentax...

What are you doing? I'm going away for a few days and having sex at my wife. I think we're doing a lunch thing.

Can't you let the little guy out?

Thundercougarfalconbird.

What's with the Wu Tang banner ads on the kennel? It just has the logo and that's it. And no, I haven't googled Wu Tang. I don't think I ever have. All of a sudden I feel the need to diversify my bonds...

What's the the appearing/disappearing accent? It's usually when food is involved. Example: I had the best ti-re-me-sue last night. It's very annoying, either speak with your accent, or don't use it sparingly. PS: I love your food. And women. But not their attitude. Oh, and cars. Well...

1- the original SNL video, which I watched 4 times yesterday, has been made unavailable in Australia for some reason. 2- I don't know how to properly post YouTube videos here. 3- it's hilarious. https://youtu.be/KdsT9Coon84

I'd smash him, tbh.

Anyone else had this?! It's f*cking awesome! My father in law calls it houso food but it's amazing. Especially fresh.

Anyone else been following this lotto? Started at 500 million and has now hit 1.3 billion dollars. Insane. And anyone else hear about the guy in Vegas or whatever that won 700 million? They asked him what he's going to spend it on and he replied "a bunch of hookers and cocaine" haha.

What's the worst movie you've ever seen? I've got a couple, I, for some F'd up reason watched dude where my car (more like: dude, where's my refund?) when it first came out. I don't know why I did considering I can't stand that guy from that 70's show. Klutcher or something. And I...

Not emphysema.

Happy birthday, Mr. Velk. All the best.

Who's fair game these days? Can't touch gays, lesbians, trannies, women, non whites, paedophiles, murderers and rapists. (the left adore the last three) So who's fair game? Whites? Can we mock whites?

Anyone have one? I feel like playing the Mario games I used to love as a kid. $400 for a Wii seems a bit much, tbh.

The left wing, perpetually outraged PC twitter brigade got out their pitchforks/hashtags over Chris Gayle's "disrespectful" comments to Mel Mcwhatever. Come on armchair activists, you can do better than that! Hashtag come on! Hashtag faux outrage...

Read this article. Seems like racism is the tool of the devil for some and the point of humour for others. Apparently, constantly mentioning someone's skin colour is ok, "mayonnaise monster, white devil and whitest white 'boi'" are not racial slurs and doing the EXACT same thing is alright if...

This guy. This guy here.

Today. Includes speeding, seatbelts and now phone. So don't be like my wife and get the hell off the phone while driving.

Would you rather: A) Make out with Bea Arthur for an hour. (when he was alive) Or B) Get kicked in the balls or moot hard, twice.

What language(s) can you speak and what do you wish you could speak? I speak English, Engrish and Assyrian. I wouldn't say I know how to speak Arabic but I know the basics, not enough to hold a conversation. I'd love to learn how to speak Chinese, German and Spanish. Oh, and Arabic. The...

We all know Facebook is serious business. Everyone lives the perfect life and the world is very lucky to have armchair activists who add a French flag or a rainbow flag to their avatar. What issues have you had or have you heard of on Facebook? Apparently, not adding someone on Facebook is...

http://australianaviation.com.au/2015/12/ana-star-wars-787-to-touch-down-in-sydney-on-saturday/ I would have gone if I didn't have a Christmas party.

So there are a select few PS2 games available on the PS4. However, as usual, Australia doesn't have it (yet?). So I created an American account/region and I see the PS2 games are there. I go to pay for Gta San Andreas but it keeps telling me my credit card number is wrong. I need help...

Finish it. It's good to be a man because we can pee anywhere we want and we don't get periods. It's good to be an Arab. Due to everyone's racism people automatically assume you're a terrorist and leave you alone. Ah, Campbelltown.

Which is your favourite? To me, the classic red and white is best. Those multi coloured monstrosities look and taste disgusting. Wannabe candy canes.

They seem to happen everyday and I don't mean to sound cold but I don't really give it much though. But there's always exceptions. I was pretty upset when James Gandolfini and Jonah Lomu passed away. And I still remember hearing Dean Martin passed away in '95. I love that guy. Which...

Can we merge the PS4 and Xbox One thread and sticky it in place of the pc gaming thread that no one has touched in almost a year, please? Plus, Moe made that thread and no one likes him.

Assassin says that SoH is the "king of the simpsons" which I find deeply offensive. So, I challenge you SoH to quote anything from any episode and I will know it/add to it. Oh, this goes for anyone who thinks they're the Queen of summer time. Help embiggen this thread by adding your...

The dumb broad who pushed the cop over, let's give her a beard and let's pretend she came from another region of the world. Now picture that person pushing over a cop and picture the headlines and front pages....

Wtf is a person to do? Need for speed comes out tomorrow, cod on Friday. Assassin's creed is already out, forza is still amazing. Then you have fallout released next week. What games are you guys getting?

Anyone else turning their front lights off and pretending not to be home tonight?

Aaaaaand go!

Whoever tagged the Gunners thread, take the tags off, FFS! Haha.

When did society become so f*cking fancy? I don't want sea salt and balsamic vinegar chips, I want just plain salt and vinegar chips. I don't want fancy meats on my pizza, just give me pepperoni or ham and pineapple. Chili chocolate Tim Tam's? No, thanks. Plain will do me. And now maccas...

The El Masri thread got me thinking. What has your missus done to piss you off? We have 9,865,365 pillo...sorry "cushions" on the bed but God help me if I use one as a pillow. When she talks to me while playing xbox. Or playstation.

Cart your arse on in otherwise I'll boot you and report you to me member of parliament. http://www.9news.com.au/national/2015/10/16/15/39/aussies-get-behind-proposal-to-change-currency-to-dollarydoos

So I was hanging one of my 30 pisses a day at work. My colleague comes in, pisses, doesn't flush and doesn't wash his hands. He's a nice guy in general but, evidently, a dirty ****. I kinda wanna say something but I don't want to embarrass him. What would you do?

Besides being massively over rated and having a face you want to take a cricket bat to, why the hell does he appeal for a penalty on every single play the ball. He literally has discussions with the referee(s) and holds up the play. I took great joy seeing him fail tonight. And Hodges. And...

Thoughts? Haven't played much of it. The passing seems better but the through balls seem a bit off, might just have to get used to it.

Where'd they go?

We seem to be the only team that doesn't go for 2 points off penalties. It has worked 2/3 times recently. Worked against the woman bashers and Drugcastle but it didn't work against the virgins and if we did, the game would have gone to golden point. My vagina says take the 2 points, but my...

Finish them off. I've never had a bad... Fuji apple. I've never had a good... Meal at an Italian restaurant. They all taste the same and I can make it a billion times better at home. I've never had... Sex. I will one day, though. I've never watched... Game of Thrones/incest...

Has anyone seen this show? It's so f'ing hilarious. Seriously, one of the funniest shows I've ever seen. I'd post clips but I'm on my phone. Just YouTube Bojack Horseman. Hilarious.

Am I the only Simpsons freak (now look what you've done to him you little FREAKS!) here who sees the Simpsons absolutely everywhere? Literally everywhere. I even laugh to myself when someone quotes the Simpsons without knowing it. Frogs are forever known as chuzwazzas to me, I want to legally...

About the opposite sex. I wish the missus had another seven thousand pillows on the bed. Takes half an hour to make the bed, FFS. And when women leave the toilet seat down.

So that's alright to say to a player stating his case for a try? Players, several at times, are always at the referee stating their case for a try. I've never heard it said to anyone else... Can the big bad Josh Reynolds say that to referees? Or is respect a one way street?

For the rest of your life, what would it be? Mine are between GTA V, San Andreas, Red Dead and Minecraft. I'd probably choose GTA V as there is more to do. Has to be a single game. Can't be a series like every FIFA, Madden, etc...

This morning I woke up with a bruise on my heel. Anyone else wake up with unexplained bruises, too? Or am I the only asswipe who does.

While we all agree that orange drinks are the best and not a single person ever born would disagree, which one is best? IMO, Mein fuhrer juice is the best.

I meant to write this up earlier but I haven't been well. Us Canterbury supporters, rightly or wrongly, cop it pretty bad in the media. The perception is we're a bunch of trouble makers and going to a Bulldogs game is the equivalent to swimming in shark waters. Whatever the perception is...

How do you have yours? Anyone who says "medium well" or "well done" need to get the f*ck out of this thread, city, state, country, hemisphere and planet. Just eat a wooden stake, FFS.

Dragons defence? The Blue and White have you covered...

WTF is that? I hope there are no injuries.

The kennel elel isis stuffedstuffewhat's happebinghwhen iIpost. tning whenisThis isis whats

Which is the lesser of 3 evils? I can't stand any of them TBH but I need my fix of the news. Sunrise are annoying as f*ck. The fat version of Melissa Doyle laughs and giggles at any and everything then the newsreader, Natalie or something?, laughs too and f*cks the news up. Can't stand David...

We all have embarrassing secrets, admit them here. I admit that I LOVE the song rock-a-bye your bear by the wiggles. I know all the words and actions. I have it on Spotify and if anyone asks, I say it's for my nephew. But it really isn't. Sssh, Sssh, Sssh.