Awesome Jokes You Can Use on Your Friends.

[K E]

Did you hear that blonde actress died? Reese Something...
Witherspoon?
Nah, with a knife......... (Holds for laughter)

Knock knock.
Who's there?
An interrupting cow
An interrupting co....
Moooooo!

If you're Australian in the living room, what are you in the bathroom?
European.

All of my jokes. If you heard them elsewhere, they were stolen off me.

 

[purpleskittles]

Well my bestie when I say something was huge she responds with "Like your head" to which I reply with "at least it ain't my arse" looking down at hers.

Kinda our in joke.

 

[K E]

My cousin is hairy and I tell him to take his skivvy off when he swims.

 

[purpleskittles]

When dad tells me to kiss his arse, I walk up to him and give him a kiss on the forefead.

 

[K E]

On Friday Ahmed goes to Anna, "feel my beard." She did. Then I go "Feel my beard." She did, I then said "I didn't mean the beard on my face."

I'm priceless!

 

[Rodzilla]

that interupting cow joke was first used by me on the kennel thank you

 

[K E]

that interupting cow joke was first used by me on the kennel thank you

What? I'll fight you to the death for it.

 

[Book]

I will referee this fight, as I am the King of The Kennel.

 

[K E]

Can we change it to a pizza eating contest? I think I can take Roddan (See what I did there?)

 

[Gladiator.]

KK is New Zealander, therefore he can be the SECURITY! I will referee this match...

 

[Book]

KK is New Zealander, therefore he can be the SECURITY! I will referee this match...

Islanders do security, brah.

 

[K E]

Islanders do security, brah.

You got it wrong, Islander do SECURITY! at the Cross, NZ'ers do SECURITY! on George Street.

And old Arab dudes do SECURITY! at RSL's and shiz.

 

[Rodzilla]

ke i will destroy you in a pizza eating contest

this could get expensive

 

[K E]

ke i will destroy you in a pizza eating contest

this could get expensive

Pfft! I eat like a butterfly and sting like K E.

Do Pizza Hut still have restaurants where it's all you can eat? There was one in Merrylands and that closed down. I remember me and my hairy cousins went there after a game once and fcking destroyed every pizza.

I like pizza.

 

[Rodzilla]

Pfft! I eat like a butterfly and sting like K E.

Do Pizza Hut still have restaurants where it's all you can eat? There was one in Merrylands and that closed down. I remember me and my hairy cousins went there after a game once and fcking destroyed every pizza.

I like pizza.

lol you needed your cousins assistance to close down an all you can eat pizza

i can do it all by myself, i would set up camp aka homer simpson at the japanese seafood restaurant

 

[K E]

lol you needed your cousins assistance to close down an all you can eat pizza

i can do it all by myself, i would set up camp aka homer simpson at the japanese seafood restaurant

If you sue Pizza Hut for false advertising, and seeing as Lionel Hutz is no longer with us, I'll be your lawyer.

 

[LebaneseBulldog]

Did you hear that blonde actress died? Reese Something...
Witherspoon?
Nah, with a knife......... (Holds for laughter)

Knock knock.
Who's there?
An interrupting cow
An interrupting co....
Moooooo!

If you're Australian in the living room, what are you in the bathroom?
European.

All of my jokes. If you heard them elsewhere, they were stolen off me.

LMAOOOOO that ones funny

 

[Rodzilla]

LMAOOOOO that ones funny

you're welcome

 

[K E]

Shu, Adam.

 

[K E]

Fck off, Roddan! He was talking to me.